A
female
age
41-50,
*issmolly01
writes:When I was 19 I fell in love with my best friend and him and I started dating and I lost my virginity to him. He was the first and only guy I had ever fallen in love with. It wasn't an easy journey because he was addicted to meth but I did everything I could to help him get clean and it worked. I did everything I could for him and was head over heals in love with him. A year ago he proposed to me and I was so happy. I had waited 6 years for that day. Seven hours later he broke up with me and told me that he had been cheating on me for a month and that he was in love with her. He then preceeded to tell me that the only reason he was with me was because he felt obligated to be with me because of all I had done for him and that he asked me to marry him because he was trying to convince himself that he loved me but doesn't. My heart completely shattered.I still have a hard time understanding how you can spend 6 years of your life with someone because you feel obligated. I truly believed he loved me and that my best friend would never do anything to hurt me. It's been 1 year and a week since he left me. I have met guys that like me but I can't seem to feel the same way about them as I did him. And I spend many nights awake crying and wondering if I will ever fall in love with anyone else again? And I start to miss the way he use to look at me, the things he'd say to make me smile, the things he'd do to make me laugh and I begin to wonder if I will ever have that in my life again. Will I ever find someone who I fall in love with who loves me in return? Can I ever love again? I look at all my friends who are married or in relationships where they are truly in love and it breaks my heart because I wonder why I can't have the same.
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best friend, broke up, fell in love, lost my virginity Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (14 July 2009):
 You will meet someone who loves you....very soon.
A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (14 July 2009):
 aw hun!
of course you will find love again!
the reason why you're probably feeling the way you are towards other guys is because you are afraid.
you're afraid to fall in too deep with them should they build your hopes up to shatter them just like the first one.
i mean not all guys are like him!
it's pretty sick what he's done to you i mean he shouldn't have stayed with you because he felt he HAD too because you helped him.
i mean i am sure you wouldn't have minded if he just said in the beginning rather than drag it on for 6 years!
you can love again and you will it just takes time i mean you were with him for 6 years and you thought you were destined to be together and that he was the one!
he should not of carried on such a relationship with you knowing full well how you felt about him and him having doubtful feelings when he first experienced this he should of told you right away!
of course you'd have been hurt but he would of been honest with you from DAY 1 rather than 6 years down the line!
it's noly been a year and a week so you still need to give yourself time to heal i mean your wound is still deep and fresh and you'll probably not let a guy close to you for a while but you WILL love again and someone who loves you back will be there for you FOREVER!
because you deserve it! totally!
i hope this helps hun. message me should you wish to speak further :)
x ilovebowsandcherries x
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A
male
reader, tomosjames +, writes (14 July 2009):
 I went through a very similar situation where I thought I would be alone for the rest of my life. The trick is, and this is hard to do, let him go. Put everything you have of his (objects and memories alike) into a little box and tuck it away safe, out of sight. From the sounds of things, you are a very kind, generous and selfless person - you have a lot of love to give. Don't rush things, just take your time (maybe focus your life on a dream you have aspired to achieve) and things will all work out in the end.
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