A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: right i am seeing a man nearly 9 weeks and i am very confusing about him . we had great sex but all he text me about sex and on sites . he never takes me out to make them know i am his girlfriend at all . i only see him oone or 2 times a week at weekend have sex and leaves early mornings ... what does this make any sense and what leaves me do with him , should i dumped him?
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female
reader, sammi star +, writes (11 November 2010):
search the articles on here, there's one that you may find answers your question quite well...
A
female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (11 November 2010):
You're being used for sex..and he probably thinks this is ok because you haven't said it bothers you and you keep sleeping with him.
Have you even talked about having a relationship? How did you meet?
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A
female
reader, sky_flower +, writes (11 November 2010):
you should have gotten him used to the idea of wanting him to take you out on the first days of the relationship, after nine weeks the guy clearly sees you are comfortable with the idea of him not taking you out,thats why he doesnt even bother...
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A
female
reader, DenimandLace44 +, writes (11 November 2010):
Jilly is right...(the other posters are ALL right as well) in saying you should be more astute at your age.
You are not his girlfriend. You are his F*** buddy. Stop giving him sex and he will not keep coming around. You need to stop seeing him if this is not the type of relationship you want, and find someone else. Good luck , hunny.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): Yes I agree this guy is treating you as a commodity for sex, and NO you should not put up with it, but as usual the guy is getting all the flack, when in fact IF we read YOUR question properly - you indicate words like ' site, texts about sex '
Now this sounds very much like YOU have put yourself up on some social networking site like facebook got chatting with some guy you have few words with online, and GET into bed with him when you do meet.
You are 41-50 so I'm surprised that ONE: you are trying to hook up with guys in this manner - it's a well known fact a lot of social networking sites have lots of guys looking for the SEX without the girlfriend bit - there are women looking for the same too, which is fine IF both parties are aware of this. TWO: NO woman if she wants a relationship, boyfriend, girlfriend situation, has sex with a guy who has NOT already dated her loads of times, gone out to dinner, met up with his friends and vice versa to KNOW and establish IF there is a relationship possibility or if it's just sex the guys after.
Which again at your age, I'm surprised a little you don't seem aware of this. So STOP having sex with him, you are NOT dating, he is not sharing his life with you, only your bed.
For the future DON'T have sex with any guy until you have dated for a while and you feel you are actually dating - don't look for guys on social networking sites!
Jilly
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): He only wants sex he doesn't want you to be his girlfriend. If you're ok with that then carry on but if not it's time to leave.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (11 November 2010):
It sounds like all he wants is a physical relationship, if you want more he is not the right guy for you.
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A
male
reader, soon567 +, writes (11 November 2010):
honestly you couldnt actually dump someone that you really don't have.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (11 November 2010):
You sound more like friends with benefits than a girlfriend! He has sex with you once to twice a week and doesn't stick around to bask in the aftermath? Yep, he's using you for sex. Dump him.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (11 November 2010):
This does not sound like a proper relationship, it sounds more as though he is only with you for sex. Stop having sex with him and leave him.
I hope that helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): this guy is not taking u out cause he doesn't consider u as a girlfriend , u should absolutely dump him, i'm surprised u haven't realised it yet. dump him as we speak.
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A
male
reader, Lupus +, writes (11 November 2010):
Sound's to me that he only wants sex, he's taking on the physical side of the relationship and not the emotional side. He won't even take you out? ask him why.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): i think you should talk to him and ask him questions on why he dosnt want everyone know that your his gf.I think his hiding somthing.Well toking would be best.Tell him how u feel when he treats you lik that.And put a stop on sex for awhile.And see if his still wid u widout sex than its ok otherwise time to move on!
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