A
female
age
30-35,
*sdfg
writes:I signed up for eHarmony just over a month ago and about two weeks in, went on my first date. It went well, and we've been seeing each other ever since. It seemed to me like he was moving really, really, really fast but I figured "to hell with so-called rules" and went along with it. He asked me if I wanted to be exclusive with him and I said yes. We were officially a couple. Even facebook official, lol. Well, tonight we were texting and in the middle of our conversation, he randomly says, "Hey, don't be mad at me but I uploaded some pictures onto my eHarmony page.""I have to ask, why?""Just because I have to pay until September but don't worry I just uploaded some photos just for the sake of it."---what?? Sure, I get the whole 3-month subscription thing. I'm in the exact same boat; I can't close my account until September, either. But I'm not using that as an excuse to still utilize or even check my profile and update it--not unless things don't work out, anyway. He was the one who foot the bill to drive 2 hours to meet me only 2 weeks after we started talking. He was the one who wanted to be exclusive after only a short time dating. He's the one who's already bringing up the idea of me coming to his family's house while I'm on thanksgiving break. And now he's still updating his profile? What's the deal?
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female
reader, asdfg +, writes (22 August 2010):
asdfg is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, the relationship is over. Thanks for your guises advice. :)
A
male
reader, serenity80  +, writes (13 August 2010):
He's obviously still looking for who else is still out there. How unfair on you!
If you are able to play it cool, maybe you should find some great photos of yourself and update your profile too. Tell him casually that you've done it, and say you're just waiting your subscription out too. Don't say you're doing it because he's doing it. Come across as it not being a problem.
You'll soon see how serious he is about you with his reaction!
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A
female
reader, natmarie +, writes (13 August 2010):
 I had/ exacty the same problem. He sounds insecure. My now ex BF done the same. He even took me away to meet his family, and done all the BF stuff, but stayed on the sight saying he was 'just chatting to people'. Soooo.. I assumed a false profile, and emailed him to see if he would take the bait... he was literally just chatting, and did not ask to meet even though I suggested it. However, that's not the point.. if it makes you uncomfortable he shouldn;t be damm well doing it. I was very hurt, and he said it meant nothing, so I took my profile down to prove a point. He even put new photos on there too. He is disregarding your feelings. Watch out for this type of character. I have just finished with mine, as he has turned out to be a selfish control freak/.. that was a big red flag what he done. let me know what happens.
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A
female
reader, cocoqueen88 +, writes (13 August 2010):
 well sounds like he wants you to be exclusive to him and not the other way around. he's still hunting on the web probably for someone a bit closer than you are. he may still like you but that's a clear sign that he's still going to meet people from that sight
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