A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend does not treat me the way I want to be treated he belittles me al the time. I believe is my fault because he has been doing for a while now and I have never been able to defend my self. Now I'm beyond tired of it. I don't even feel like he respects me. The treat-her-like-crap behavior has increased in the pass week. He and I went to a hotel room. We had sex and then near the end of our stay in the room he wanted to go again and I said "no I'm tired" because I was but he is angry because that never happen before I never say no to him for anything. Aside from really feeling tired I was in pain because he hurt me during the time we spent together. The worst part is that I lied to my dad to get the money for the hotel room (which I am beyond ashamed about and will never forgive me self for) so I told him and he was beyond incensity about it. He started yelling about me thinking that is a chore to be with me. Which it isn't. I'm tired of being treated like less then I'm worth yet at the same time he can be a real nice guy when he wants to be and I don't want to lose him. So what should I do?
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male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (26 April 2010):
Are you crazy? you think this is YOUR FAULT? NO WAY! He treats you bad, and somehow you've convinced yourself that it's YOUR FAULT??? This is a sick relationship and you need to exit it at once. Men do not treat the woman they love this way AT ALL. He's done a head trip on you and you need to separate and NOT go back to him until you can get your head straight.
QUICKLY, Google a forum for women who have been in abusive relationships, get on it and compare notes. Maybe they can share enough of their hell where you can avoid part of yours.
A
female
reader, Keira9312 +, writes (25 April 2010):
 The first question to ask yourself is: Does he really respect my feelings? If he doesn't like the way you work, he can find someone else. Sure, you may still love him, but relationships that are uncomfortable usually end in heartbreak. If i could say anything, it would be to just tell him how you feel, and if he objects and/or doesn't care, you should leave him. You'll help both him and yourself by doing that.
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A
female
reader, It's all be okay  +, writes (25 April 2010):
This is not a nice man. He belittles you. He hurt you. He doesn't care about whether you want to have sex - he only cares about what he wants. He encourages you do to something that you feel terrible about - asking your father for money - just so he can get something he wants. You are worth more than this. There are plenty of other men who can provide the nice side of this man without the nasty side - go and find one of them and dump this guy. You'll never regret it, but you'll regret it if you don't.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (25 April 2010):
 When he wants to be isn't enough here. You don't deserve to be treated this way, and he has no right to treat you this way. Why do yo want to remain with someone who treats you with such disrespect. You may not want to lose him, but doesn't his behavior reflect the low level of how he views you? You deserve much better than what you're getting, and if you remain with him, you're saying that it's okay for you to just settle for less.
You can state how you choose to be treated. If you don't wanna just leave, then you'd better sit him down, and tell him, "this is how I deserve to be treated, this is how I will be treated, if I am treated any less than I deserve, we will be parting ways." That's it. It's your life. If he doesn't like it, tell him goodbye, because that'd prove, to him, you're worth is less than what you state.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (25 April 2010):
You accept that any man can be "nice" when he wants to be.
It's what they're like when they aren't nice... that's the real them.
You are you going out with a horrible excuse for a man. He won't change.
Leave him and find a nice guy. They really are out there and when you find one you will kick yourself for putting up with this one for so long.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (25 April 2010):
He can't really be a nice guy if he always belittles you. He just can't. You need to get rid of and find a better guy. A guy who loves you won't treat you this way at all. He doesn't respect you or care for you, he's just using you and bullying you. Get rid of him.
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