A
female
age
41-50,
*otebook123
writes:I went on a blind date with a guy last night. We're both in our mid 20s. The date seemed to go pretty well. We talked and laughed, not really any awkward silences. It wasn't the best date I've been on, but it was fun and I would definitely go out with him again. At the end of the night, he said to let him know if I wanted to get together this weekend. I thought that was a good sign, but I was surprised that he didn't try to kiss me or anything... not even a hug! When I woke up this morning, I had a new text from him (he had sent it when he got home last night) saying to let him know if I am free this weekend. I texted back and thanked him for dinner last night. The part that is bugging me is that he didn't try to kiss me. I'm trying to figure out if he was just being a gentleman and didn't want to seem pushy or if he just wasn't into me. Help!
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male
reader, systemBuilder +, writes (14 June 2009):
He probably had EXACTLY the same feelings are you had, and is just being cautious. He probably had fun but it wasn't "OMG she is THE ONE" ... yet. If he kisses you maybe he's afraid you'll be all over him like a fly in molasses.
There is also a dating approach (actually from a 60's humor book) to date someone and compliment and treat them like "a lady" for 3 weeks and do NOTHING AT ALL. When the guy finally decides to make his move SUCCESS IF GUARANTEED!!
So, I don't think that his moves are at all unusual. The fastest way to ruin a relationship is to go too fast. On the other hand, most relationships ARE NOT ruined by going slowly, so maybe you matter more to him than you know !!
A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (21 May 2009):
It could be that he was SO ATTRACTED to you that he didn't want to risk frightening you away by too much affection, too soon!
Give things a chance to develop. If it gets to be 2 or 3 more smoochless dates then it's time for YOU to take the initiative and kiss HIM. That is - if you really mean it, and not just doing it because, well, because dates are SUPPOSED to end with a kiss. You didn't say a whole lot about him but it's possible he's a shy, but respectful and gentlemanly, kind of guy. If that's true then stepping forward to kiss him could make him your faithful and devoted lover for years, or even decades, to come.
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A
female
reader, Lilly Rose  +, writes (21 May 2009):
 Maybe he was shy....the end of the date is always weird do you kiss on cheek, on lips hug, handshake haha!
He sent you a text when he got in arranging another date women!!! How clear can you get thats better then any KISS! If he still hasnt kissed you after say the 4th date, then kick him to the curb!!!
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A
female
reader, notebook123 +, writes (21 May 2009):
notebook123 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your response. I was pretty much thinking the same thing. I did try to give him subtle hints like touching his arm. Maybe he just mentioned getting together again to be polite since we have a mutual friend? Oh well. Maybe I'm overthinking this and psyching myself out?!
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A
female
reader, sbarr10 +, writes (21 May 2009):
Geesh, please relax, and stop worrying about whether he kissed you and just be glad he contacted you afterwards. :) If he contacted you after the date he's still interested in you.
Do you know how many women complain after a date, "We had a GREAT time, WHY didn't he CALL?!?"
If he likes you I think he'll get around to kissing you.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (21 May 2009):
 I understand it may seem a little weird but you shouldnt worry, he has already text you and asked to make plans with you again so you can be certain that he likes you! No guy would bother getting in touch with you and asking you out again if he wasnt interested - men just tend to never speak to a woman ever again if they are not interested!
I bet he was just nervous about trying to kiss you - maybe he was worried that you were not into him, maybe he was just being a gentleman, maybe he didnt want to make you think he was only after one thing. Who knows! But it doesnt even matter, the important thing is that he likes you enough to want to see you again! On your next date maybe be a little more flirty with him and touch him subtly throughout the date (little touches on the arm etc) to give him a clear sign that you like him, and then maybe he will have the courage at the end of the night to go in for the kiss!
Remember men have it a little harder than women when it comes to dating, they have so many minefields to avoid because they want to be a gentleman but at the same time they worry about coming accross as not interested. And they are the ones expected to make all the moves! So just give him a break, and see what happens on the next date!
I hope this helps!
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