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female
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*elissatwo
writes: Should I leave my boyfriend? On Friday last week, my boyfriend promised that we would spend some time together as we have both been busy. On Saturday he turns up and tells me that he can't stay as he has promised his dad that he will help him out with a job on Sunday, so he can't see me. So I ask him if he is still going to see me on Monday, which he says yes and he will be with me by 10am. On Monday he doesn't arrive so I call his mum's and she informs me that he has been out early, so I try his mobile and not get anything from him. When he does finally answer his phone he tells me that he has been with his ex girlfriend since 7 that morning, and he needed time to think. He then tells me that he still loves his ex and needs time on his own. Later on that day about 5.30 he asks to meet me as he wants to talk, so I agree he tells me that he is sorry for the way he has been and he doesn't really love just thought it. Well now it's Friday he hasnt really texted me or called me. I have seen him for about an hour all week. When I call him he doesnt want to know. Is this the end of our relationship????
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female
reader, Delila +, writes (12 September 2005):
Why does it have to be up to him whether this is the end of the relationship? With the way this guy is messing you around YOU need to be wondering do I want to be in a relationship with this guy? Do you feel like you would not be able to meet someone else? If he said jump would you say how high? You need to up your self esteem girl. You need to be asking what do I like about this guy that makes me want to be with him. If you can't think of at least ten things really quickly than he is not the man that will make you happy.
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female
reader, charliesgirl +, writes (10 September 2005):
I am really sorry that your boyfriend is being like this. What a rubbish way to treat you.
Sadly I think he has made a decision not to see you anymore, though I'm sure you'd have had far respect for him if he'd had the balls to actually tell you, rather than leaving you to guess. Regardless of this, you do need closure so that you can grieve the relationship and then move on with your life. Call him and get a straight answer. It sounds like he's terrified of confrontation, but this is no excuse for his behaviour. Rather than clinging onto every scrap of hope that he will be coming back anytime, have the courage to confront him. You cannot remain in limbo forever. If he really wanted to stay with you, given the recent upheavals, he would've made an especial effort to rebuild the relationship. The fact he hasn't only suggests he is trying to "lose" you without the hassle.
It's time for you to think about your own needs now, and take care of yourself. You do not need a man in your life who makes you feel uncertain, unloved and sad, who meets ex lovers and cannot decide whether he's in love them or not.
Of course you will have to face the agony of heartbreak, but in time your heart will heal and you'll realise what a lucky escape you've had. And he will realise he's lost best thing that ever happened to him.
All the best
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A
female
reader, lildeesbg  +, writes (10 September 2005):
 Honestly, it sounds to me he is confused about things. As a girlfriend it is hard to face what is right infront of you. He is haninging out with his ex-girlfriend at 7 am? What is that about? Listen I have a boyfriend and I have an ex. I am not saying they should never see each other or talk on the computer or the phone for a bit. But to spend a whole day isnt right. Why wouldnt he pick up his cell phone when you called? Obviously he was with her, but if it was innocent he would have answered it. If he was 100% certain about your relationship together he would have answered the phone with no hesitation. Besides all that he came out and told you. Point being he doesnt know what he wants right now. On top of all this you havent even spoke to your boyfriend almost all week. Honestly, thats not a good sign.
If he is that confused you need to start seperating yourself from him. It is hard, trust me I know. But if you dont your going to just torture yourself everday. Its not worth it. Sit and talk to him about what is going on. If he resists from the conversation, tell him that you need a break, because you are too good of a girlfriend to go through something like this.
Be strong. You will also find another guy who isnt confused on his feelings for you.
dee =)
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reader, pops +, writes (10 September 2005):
The relationship is probably over. You will have to call him to find out for sure. But what have you lost, really? If he doesn't know who he wants to be with, why waste your time? I am sure there are men out that are more mature, and know who they are and what they want. Find one of them.
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