A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend who's moved interstate for work. He told me he's coming home in a few weeks, but has been booked out by his friends and family and wont have time to see me. I'm not upset that he's spending time with them, and think it's great he gets to see them, but taking it that he's no longer interested. Later he mentioned that he'll try and fit some time in to see me, but in so far as he'd stay one night and the next morning but then has other commitments. He made me feel so cheap! Meanwhile he's been invited out to places with his buddies, to his riends places for dinner, and can spend time with them, but for his girlfriend he can only offer a screw??? Does this sound right??? Am I just being overly sensitive??? Or should I give him the flick???
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lildeesbg +, writes (31 May 2008):
 Honestly, if you two are in a committed relationship I dont see how he cannot make time for you. Why cant he ask you to join him in all these events like seeing his buddies and family?
The problem with relationships today is that people neglect to realize that it is a working progress. Relationships are not always easy and therefore sacrificing and re-prioritizing comes into play. If someone isnt ready to do those things their not ready for a relationship.
What I suggest is to talk with your guy and outright ask him how he feels towards the relationship. If there is no reason why you cant join him in his plans then those are signs that he might be losing interest due to the distance. However, he could still be interested in the relationship but since he is used to not having you around he carries it over. Either way you will never know unless you talk with him. I also suggest that if it seems as if he just wants a "sexual hookup" then dont give in. Your his girlfriend he should want to make time to see you no matter what.
Thing of the situation in terms if the roles were reversed. Would you make time for him and include him in your plans? If so then it should go both ways.
you need to ask yourself if this is the type of relationship you want.
~dee
A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey  +, writes (31 May 2008):
 How nice of him to fit you in! No you're not being insensitive, he is!
Think you need to clarify your relationship and work out where you fit in, if you are under the impression you are his girlfriend then you have every right to feel put out and if you have your wires crossed and are no more to him than someone to sleep with when he's in town you need to decide if this relationship is worth bothering about.
You need to talk to him and find out where you stand, if he's saying you are indeed his girlfriend you need to tell him that you feel short changed here and he should be wanting to spend a bit more time with you, if not don't sleep with him you will only end up feeling used.
Good Luck.
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A
male
reader, koler  +, writes (31 May 2008):
How long have you two been "seeing" each other? If its been a short time, it may be he is just playing mind games. If its been a while, then, I would agree with you. Seems like he has lost interest in you. The first person I would want to see is my girlfriend!! He is sending you a message. He probably met someone else. Long distance relationships rarely work. Out of sight and out of mind.
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