A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi this is a question going out to all you ladies out thereJust wondering if you have ever said ' i love you forever' or ' i want to be with you forever ' or ' i will always be your girl ' to someone you have been in love with? andddd wait for it, BUT LATER ON IN LIFE changed your mind? or have you actually loved them till marriage etc. Just curious, as my gf says this all the time, HOWEVER i have been heartbroken in the past more then 3 accasions and not sure if i should believe her. Whats your take on it, and what should i DO to KEEP a woman like this. Yes she is very loyal loving etc but my own insecurities and paranoia may doubt that. any help would be great as its kinda stressing me out here
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 June 2012):
 Look you can’t let fear eat you up. If she says she loves you, she loves you… I have had sadly several divorces…
The first one was because we changed. I did love him when I married him. I loved him when I had two babies with him over the years… but he didn’t change as I did and we grew apart.
My last husband left me…. and we are still great friends… I had lunch with him Tuesday and he said… “I loved you but after I while I realized I did not know what I wanted when we married… and over the years it changed”
People change and grow and mature… if you as a couple do so together it’s great…
Life is about risks… you have two choices live life to it’s fullest and RISK it… or live in a bubble alone and miserable.
My current fiancé… very brave man… he will be my FOURTH husband. He’s much younger than I am… what a risk he’s taking… but I’m glad he’s taking that leap of faith….
Yes you believe her… and what do you do to keep her?
Treat her well
Listen to her
ASK her how to keep her happy… then DO IT.
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (15 June 2012):
 If she says that she loves you and has never given you any reason to doubt her words, then you shouldn't. But be practical and reasonable about life. Remember that when people fall in love, everyone thinks that it will last "forever". Sometimes it doesn't, but that doesn't mean that your partner lied to you or didn't mean what they said. Sometimes things change, circumstances change, life changes. But if its meant to be, then it will last forever. Always hope for the best
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (15 June 2012):
 I think everybody does. Maybe they don't say it aloud but they mean it in their heart and minds.
When people gets married, isn't it exactly like announcing to the whole world " I will love this woman - or this man - forever "?. Then, many marriages, in some countries 50% percent, end up in divorce.
When people say this stuff, at the time they mean it, really mean it ( at least most of them ).
Then things change, circumstances very, feelings die down, pressures get too strong, etc.etc.
It's called life :).
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A
female
reader, citadel  +, writes (15 June 2012):
Well we only get in life as far as our fears take us.
I say if you want two feet in, you're going to have to stop saying. I love my fears forever. Drop your top 3 most feared issues and you may find the road is long and clear.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2012): In my opinion, whenever someone (or you) say "I will love you forever" it should be qualified with a "that's how I feel today." because circumstances can and do cause people to change their feelings. You can continue to love someone even if they betray your trust, but it will not be the same so even if you were to break up with them later on you can still be keeping your word about 'loving' them forever just that it's not in the same way anymore but from more of a distance.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2012): A handful of times ;) Things change even with the right intentions. Being in love is a great feeling but actually loving someone is forever.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (14 June 2012):
 Yes. I was engaged to a man once. He proposed to me. He got me the ring and everything. He asked his best friend to be his best man.
I thought I was to be with him forever. When I said yes to marrying him, I sort of in my heart said yes to be with him until death.
Then.. well, he dumped me. And I know this isn't what you think you asked for, but is actually is. Circumstances change how you feel about things, either they force you to change how you feel, or they affect how you feel. In my case I was forced to change how I felt. If I was to love him until death NOW, after he dumped me, I wouldn't have been living a happy life at all. Never loving another man. I had to change my mind you know. I had to change how I felt about him, in order to live my life and allow myself to be happy again.
The way people feel isn't so much about conscious choices as it is a consequence of their surroundings. Your girlfriend will never CHOOSE to change her mind about you. But should you cheat on her, or dump her, or beat her, then she'll have no other choice but to change her mind about you. So yes, she CAN change her mind about you. But as long as you stay good to her, honour her, respect her, and nurture your relationship.. she will probably not change her mind. It's all about what happens in life, but if things stay just as good as they are now, she'll continue to love you.
That said, I've had men who told me they'd love me forever yet we're not an item today. Sometimes things are said because you think they are right there and then, but later you discover they are not true. And unfortunately so many people speak without having thought things through. She loves you NOW that's for sure. But no one knows what the future brings, not even her. Loving someone "forever" is a gullible and naive statement. Take it with a pinch of salt. She loves you now. She can't possibly know, or guarantee, that she will love you forever. But no one can. Life isn't predictable.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (14 June 2012):
 If I had a nickel for every time I've told a girl "I'll love you forever".... as a ploy to get her to compromise her principles with me..... I'D BE A VERY WELL-TO-DO MAN!!!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 June 2012):
 I think she means it when she says it. Because she WANTS to believe it and she wants you the believe it too.
I think forever is a very long time. And I don't really think that anyone can promise to love someone forever. However, some people will FOREVER be in your heart.
PS you do not "KEEP" a woman. You share a life with her.
If you have insecurities talk to her, share them with her, maybe she can help you overcome them and if she can't, then it's up to you to seek professional help in how to deal with these insecurities.
Whomever broke you heart is the past were other women and not your current GF and it's in no way fair on her to "blame" her for past GF's behaviors and mistakes. So stop comparing them. Live in the present, let the past go. Focus on the good in your life NOW. With this girl.
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