A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:on friday nite i went to a friends house party where there was drinking involved. i was drinking and enjoying myself waiting for my boyfriend of 3 years to stop by and pick me up so that we could go home and have passionate sex. when he showed up he brought one of his friends for one of my homegirls, it wasnt working out so he decided to drop his friend off and come back for me after. i agreed, about a half hour later he was back to get me telling me that i was a drunk mess and that he was bringing me home. i didnt want to go home i wanted to be with him. his phone started ringing and ringing and he wasnt picking it up so i assumed it was another female because he was ignoring it. so i got violent with him. turns out it was his mother calling him to make sure that he came and got me because it was getting late and raining outside. we got back to his house and continues fighting, i made a complete fool of myself and im so sorry about it. he has had many drunk nights but i also understand because i love him and want to be with him... we havent spoke since friday nite. i no that its only been 2 days but we have been in a relaionship for 3 and so many other things have followed,i am compelety embaressed and want so badly for him to forgive me.. hes txted me that he needs time and that he will call me later today, but i feel like i have lost him forever!!! whats should i do?
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (26 October 2009):
Turn up, but don't be at the front. Smile if he sees you, but don't speak or mouth anything towards him. Hopefully he'll see you and know that you're there.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questiongreat so i wont txt him so much and wait to see what he has to say... he has to go to traffic court 2maro and we usually go everywhere together... would it be weird if i just show up to support him i just wanna prove i care.or do i completely back off
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A
male
reader, lionelhutz +, writes (26 October 2009):
Alcohol can create the best and worst of times. I know, I screwed up the relationship with the love of my life because of it and it was only after 4 long months she agreed to see me again.
I don't believe you've lost him but you have to show him you are sorry for your behavior, not just tell him words you think he wants to hear. We all make mistakes, but the measure of who we are is what we do afterwords: learn from them or keep making them.
There is nothing wrong with sending him a text saying how much he means to you. But don't overdue it, particularly if he doesn't reply immediately. He sounds like he definitely needs some time to himself.
Good luck
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (26 October 2009):
Well give him time to get back to you. The best thing to do would be to meet, so hopefully when he's calmed down a bit, he'll meet you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your kind words, should i continue to call him and send him text messages reminding him of how much love him and how srry i am or should i just wait until hes ready, i feel like if i see him then i will be able to make everything better but he wont every pick up so that we could meet sumwhere!! im so lost with out him!!!!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (26 October 2009):
Oh dear. Well, I don't think you've lost him, but I do think he's considering his position. You have a lot of apologizing to do, and I would make sure you don't get so drunk for a while. You need to tell him you're incredibly sorry, that you know you've embarassed him and that you're embarassed yourself and you don't expect him to forgive you at first, but that you'd at least like the chance to prove you're worthy of him. Start there and see what happens.
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