A
male
age
51-59,
*alant
writes:Hello,I just registered on this site and I find this site very interesting with lots of good advice. Well, this is my story. I really love my wife, I love my children and my home. I recently shifted to another Ministry and I am presently having an affair with a woman working in the same Ministry than me. She too is married. In my previous Ministry I had an affair with a girl. To be honest with you I treated her like my piece of cake kept for me that I could eat whenever I wanted. It's not my fault, out of love she chosed to be my piece of cake though she knew that I was marrried. I did not give her much importance in my life as I did not want her to get too deeply attached to me. Then I met the woman with whom I am having an affair and I've taken my distance with the girl. The problem is that she came to know about my affair with this woman and she managed to get proof of my affair and now she has threatened to tell everything to my wife. She explained to me her reasons why she would do this. She said that I always treated her like shit, I never spent time with her, I abused of her love for me and used her for my own sexual pleasure. I want her to forgive me with all the wrong I did to her but I do not know how. Please help.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2009): I understand peoploe might get angry at reading your post. But I also don't understand how people replying can be so judgmental. Hello guys, this is a site for looking out for help, not to get scolded, for whatever reason. If your only comment is something like 'get real', I suggest you refrain from posting.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2009): OMG, i cannot believe your audacity. why do you not ask your Ministry for advise about both of your affairs. maybe they will kick you out, as you deserve. well, you got your cake and you ate it, as well as this other married woman ,as well as your wife. why don't you ask your wife how to deal with these two mistresses in your life. i am sure she would have some ideas, i am afraid we on this site may not provide adequate answers to your marital infidelity. what do you take us for........the others have said it all. get real, what a piece of work you have turned out to be. Hope your wife kicks your sorry ass out in the street. what is a piece of sh1t like you doing in the ministry anyway. providing sexual relief to others???
"piece of cake" wow, i am laughing my head off. as i said GET REAL.
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A
male
reader, JSBach  +, writes (25 June 2009):
What a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive. The best advice I can give is this: if you think that it's inevitable that your wife will find out, tell her first, and tell her everything - there is just a slight chance that you will be able to save your marriage, but I'm not very optimistic. Try to put yourself in your wife's position: imagine you discovered that she had been having an affair with one lover, and then dumped him for lover number 2.
I'm not judging you, but don't just think about how this is going to impact you: your wife and your children are going to suffer a hell of a lot more.
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A
female
reader, MonicaC  +, writes (25 June 2009):
 If you're expecting sympathy here, I'm afraid you won't find it. Do you mean to tell us that you are in some type of religious ministry and this is how you are conducting yourself? Honestly, I'm not a judgemental person, but that kind of sounds bloody awful.
I don't know what to tell you except you should wake up to yourself and realize that you are not above the moral codes that you espouse to others. Why do you feel justified in having affairs with all these women, using them and then disposing of them all the while having a wife and a church ministry?
You really need a dose of religion, my friend. Not the artifical kind either. The real kind that says: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (25 June 2009):
 So what exactly are you asking? You want advice on how to pull the wool over the eyes of your ex-mistress? How to get her to believe that you didn't just use her as a piece of meat even though that's precisely what you did? How to convince her not to report all your sordid doings to your poor wife? Help for a serial cheater...fat chance.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2009): I suggest you tell your wife all about your dirty secrets and let her decide if she still wants to be married to you. You are a serial cheater and I hope you get what you deserve.
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A
female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (25 June 2009):
 Thats what u get for playing with fire im afraid.....there is no advice here....you just have to deal with what is coming to you.....maybe then you can let your wife be free and let her meet a good man who will not cheat on her....and then you can be free to be with as many women as you like without any ties!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2009): Are you for REAL. God I so so hope she tells your poor wife and you loose everything..........
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