A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear friends...i need some advice. I broke up with my bf 5 months ago and It's been really hard.I know our relationship wasn't working and that we tried so many times to be ok, but we argued a lot!i never stopped missing him, though...recently, we started talking again, and he told me he didn't meet any girl (meaning he hasn't kissed or had sex with anyone this past 5 months), and that he's certain we'll get back together, but wants to take it slow.i haven't been with any guy either and i was pretty happy with what he told me...but there are 2 things bothering me: today, we became facebook friends again (when we broke up i unfriended him) and 2 weeks ago he wrote on his status: "i miss you" and "you make me feel so good"... i believe this messages were not for me, since i couldn't see them... do you guys think he lied to me when he said he didn't meet anyone?and the second thing is that he never calls, never texts... but whenever i do, he answer and is super friendly... i have this wierd feeling that he's using me... and that anytime he meets someone new, he'll say goodbye for good.but i also believe that if we gave us another chance, things might work out!what do you guys think?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 November 2011):
 IF in doubt, drop out...
stop rowing the relationship boat and see what happens.
do not call him
do not text him
do not suggest getting together
see what he does...
personally I agree that he was not able to replace you and he's just dragging you along till something better comes along.
there is a REASON folks break up.... we need to listen to those reasons in our own heads and know we did the right thing... there is no harm in being a single person....
I too have the "Noah's Ark" complex and think I'm better partnered but alone is FINE...
compromise in finding a partner is good settling is NOT
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionEyespy17, i feel he might be using me to make him feel good 'bout himself... i broke up with him, and at the time, it seemed like the right thing to do...
i could be wrong, but i believe he might be thinking "the girl who dumped me still loves me and wants to be with me, besides she hasn't been with any guys because she still has feelings for me", i guess it's good for his ego.
but now, thinking about what you guys have said, it seems that he doesn't want me back that much... i have to admit i was sooooooo happy with the possibility of having him back, but honestly, if he wanted to get back together, he wouldn't keep me hanging...
i myself wouldn't want to spend a second a way from the person i love...
i just really hope he's not lying to me... i never lied to him... if he'd been honest, and told me "i've been with other women and realised i can't forget you", i'd be ok with it... but i can't stand lies!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (7 November 2011):
 I think your ex's parliance needs a bit of translation :
" I did not meet anybody else in the last 5 months " = I tried , but I could not get any new chicks.
" I want to take it slow " = I'll keep you hanging there while I look around a bit more and if nothing happens, I know I can get you back whenever I want.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2011): It could be that he lied- if you can't see these messages how do you know what they say?
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A
female
reader, Eyespy17 +, writes (7 November 2011):
Trust your gut.
I don't believe that he hasn't met anyone else in 5 months ... but he may not have met anyone else special and that's why he wants you back.
What could he be using you for?
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A
female
reader, goldengirl88  +, writes (7 November 2011):
Hi, i know what its like to miss someone like crazy and want them back. But if you have a weird feeling them i would follow your instincts because they are usually right. plus the facebook incident sems abit suss so i do think he is probably lying about that as well. Trust your feelings, if something does not feel right them it probably isnt.
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A
male
reader, paul1 +, writes (7 November 2011):
Forget him. If he never calls or even texts you he's not interested and is stringing you along. If he was interested he would keep in touch. If you miss someone, why would you write it on your wall/status where anyone could see? This is a personal message why not say it on the phone or in text or letter? He is clearly wanting to confuse or get attention in some way, or worse he has a number of girls on the go and this is an easy way to tell them all that he 'misses' them. Forget him, and move on to someone who can be bothered putting in the effort, stop tormenting yourself.
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