A
female
age
36-40,
*achakaRoni
writes:how do you know if a guy likes you as a possible girlfriend? or if he is just interested in sex- you as a friend with benefits? what are the signs that he wants you as a girlfriend? thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): ok..
he rings you and makes plans to contact you.
he makes plans to see you.. he ask you out in advance!
dont sleep or have sex if you like a guy and want to have a relationship. tell him you want a relationship. also if he is online (dating site)...def dont even think about sleeping/sex. make sure u both remove your dating profiles!
tell him you want to be exclusive and u want a relationship..if he pushes 4 sex..he wants friends with benefit. if he is wanting to take time to get know..you he is def boyfriend material...goodluck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): "what are the signs that he wants you as a girlfriend?"
There are no signs they're the same signs in both scenarios. The mistake girls often make is they try to look for signs instead of making things happen and talking to the guy that they're seeing.
Girls that just start sleeping with a guy without ever asking the important questions are the ones that most often get hurt by guys who would have told them from the start that it was only ever going to be a casual thing.
Some general things though. When I had friends with benefits we never really met up to do anything but have sex. There were no romantic dates where I didn't try and get the girls alone. It was a sexual agreement I wasn't interested in dating them and wooing them so I didn't make the effort to do that. Sure I talked like we were a couple, I said sweet things to them, told them they were lovely, sexy etc. But sex was the only thing I wanted from them so a relationship was not on the cards and it's something we agreed upon from the start.
You see it's essential to get "the talk" out of the way early. You see OP it's never too early to find out what a person is looking for in my opinion, why they are meeting up with you. As soon as you think you have feelings for someone you have to tell them and you have to find out if they're on the same page. I mean you could date a guy a week or months before you develop feelings but the moment you start to feel something you need to know if he feels the same. It's vital you both are on the same page. If you know from the start that you only want to be FWB's then tell him from the start. If you don't do FWB's then you need to make sure he knows tat from the start too. It's not hard OP, just don't be one of these people that sits back and tries to read signs.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): I think you should know the difference by your age. Compare the FWB to men you or your friends have dated,had a relationship with.....it's pretty obvious.
They only contact when they want sex..then once they've had that,well, they will have every excuse ready as to why they go quiet. Their life away from you will be a total mystery pretty much.
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A
female
reader, Auntie E  +, writes (2 March 2012):
 Trust your gut if you think this guy wants to be FWB then chances are you're right. Listen to Auntie Em, she is spot on. No matter what any guy says, he does not respect a booty call and he's the only one benefiting. Why? Well he gets laid with little or no effort at all. He doesn't even have to take the FWB out! Who wants to be that girl?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): He takes you out on dates vs hanging out and he ASKS you to be his girlfriend. He never tells you he isn't ready for a relationship or how he wants to take things slow while he's sleeping with you! He doesn't disappear for stretches of time and he's always making plans to see you. There are no signs you have to read into, just actions or lack of.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (2 March 2012):
 If he wants you as a girlfriend he will date you and get to know you for a while, allow you to know all about him, intro duce you to his friends and family and discuss with you mutually when to start having sex when it feels right for both of you.
If he wants you for a FWB, he will come on strong with the sweet talk, call you or text you at odd hours (late at night), not have proper dates with you. He will avoid introducing you to friends and family (because he may have a girlfriend already) and he will go very cold after sex and withdraw until he gets horny again and sweet talks you into bed again.
In the periods after sex you might not be able to contact him by phone and he may not respond to your texts, in fact he may avoid giving you his number or his address. He may also make promises of dating you or even tell you he loves you and then again, after sex tells you that you are 'just a friend' then he dissapears again...and again...again...and again...You get the picture?
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