A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of 8 months gets upset if I don’t call when I say I will. Sometimes I say I’m going to call, then something will come up or work will get busy. Then I call later. What’s the big deal? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2011): You could just save the whole argument by shooting her a text saying you a tied up at work, but you are still thinking of her.
A
female
reader, Bellaxxx  +, writes (11 May 2011):
I had this prob with my bf, he didn't get that I would be sitting by the phone waiting for him to call and be hurt when he didn't even take the time to txt to say he was held up, Its not nice been left hangin. I could have been doin other stuff but he said he'd call and Id expect him 2. Im not clingy,r anything like that, I just don't like waitin around for someone to call only for them not to. If u cant call take 30 sec to txt an let her know, that way she knows u care an can get on with her own stuff!!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (11 May 2011):
 The big deal is that's RUDE.
And it shows flakiness- you can't be trusted to do what you say you'll do. Your words are empty.
There is an easy way to solve this problem. Don't tell her you'll call if you are not absolutely sure you will. Or at least say " I'll try my best to call you, but I might not be able to ".
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 May 2011):
 It shows a lack of respect for her if you ditch her, don't show up when you're supposed to, or don't keep your half of the agreement. You said you would call, then you need to call. It's not that difficult to do, so it is offensive when you can't make the effort to keep your word.
Of course, people can forget. A slip-up here and there is alright. But if you close to never remember about it, or keep forgetting about her, you are sending her a signal that she isn't important enough to you to remember about. That she is easily forgotten about, and not cared for. In the end, your promises and words will have no meaning to her, if she's used to you not following up.
When you tell her you will call she is sitting around waiting for you. You are wasting her time and energy if you fail to call her when you say you will. But hey, what's the big deal about that you think? Do you think it is fun when you wait for someone and they don't show up?
I hope by now you understand the importance of doing what you promised to do.
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A
female
reader, Elydiese +, writes (11 May 2011):
just dont say when you will call her it is a big deal as shes been waiting for your call if you're not sure about calling her at an exact time then dont tell her that
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (11 May 2011):
 It's about having enough respect to keep your promise to her. If you aren't sure you are going to call, don't make the promise.
It comes down to respect and trust. If you keep a promise it shows you have respect for her and she in turn can trust you back.
It's pretty simple.
If you can't for some reason call when you promised make sure that when you CAN call, you do. Let her know that work came up.
I think she is feeling like "out of sight out of mind" as in.. you don't care.
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A
male
reader, shawncaff +, writes (11 May 2011):
 From her perspective, she is waiting for your call. If you said that you would call at, say, 5 PM, she made sure to set aside that time to talk to you. So when you don't call at that time, it's like she made that effort for nothing.
Also, there are other reasons. She probably looked forward to your call, and when she didn't hear from you, she felt hurt because something that was important to her was not so important to you. And, even though it might seem small, it is an indication of how much you keep your word.
I can understand her feelings. I don't know often this happens, but if it happens a lot, I think you should explain that you will TRY to call but things might be busy. Or, keep your commitment and call her at that time, but only speak for a minute and say you will have to call back later.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2011): It's not the big deal, you know. She is just the kind of person who doesn't like lies and cheating, not only on your behalf i suppose. For instance i also can't stand when sb promises sth and doesn't keep his word. If you are not sure, then just don't tell her you will call, if you will it'll be a pleasant surprise for her :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2011): never be to busy to communicate with your girlfriend
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