A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my girl friend told me awhile ago that she cheated on me twice with two diff. people.. she cried alot and i cud tell she fells really bad about it but im pissed. we had minor problems things that cud of been fixed but she chose to cheat...at the same time i love her...she promised me she wud b faithful...she was always honest we always talked about our issues....but this hurts..nd she lost my trust dispite her honesty...i dont kno what to do..i love her but i can't really stand to look at her right now...
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female
reader, starfairy  +, writes (27 November 2010):
 You need some time to yourself, to decide where to go from here. Do you still want to be with her? Do you feel you can carry on the relationship despite the cheating? Will you always be on edge, wondering where she is when she goes out, wondering who she's with?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2010): 4 years
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2010): 4 years
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2010): 4 years
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A
male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave +, writes (27 November 2010):
To be cheated on once is bad enough but with two different guys must be more than a kick in the teeth and it's even harder when it's someone you love.
Having a few problems in a relationship is no excuse to cheat but it's an often-used poor excuse to use for going off with someone else.
You say you still love her, but she has lost your trust and trust is one of the key ingredients to a good relationship.
You have to think whether you would be able to trust her again and if you will have the same level of trust.
How long have you been together?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (27 November 2010):
See, if had been once, maybe I could have said it was worth a shot. But it was with two different people. And that makes this more difficult. Her reaction suggests that she actually is sorry, but then I've seen people cry before and it's all be a bunch of lies.
I think you need to take some time alone, like the others say, and work out what YOU want. This is the sort of thing that can take so long to get over, and before you go to her and say that you forgive her, you need to know that you want to forgive her, and that you can forgive her.
Take some time alone and ask yourself one question very carefully - Is she worth another chance?
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (27 November 2010):
 Take some time away from each other. She probably does love you a lot if she cried as much as you said as she revealed it all to you. I doubt she will make the same mistakes again so willingly after that what happened. Take a few days to sift through your thoughts and cool your heart down.
Of course after this, you will find that trust is not so easily regained and I think she will realize this as well. If she does nothing to regain your trust and prove that she loves you, talk to her about it and be honest.
You can always choose to leave her completely. Find someone else who will always be faithful.
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (27 November 2010):
 Let's see she broke a promise twice, yeah that's gotta hurt pretty bad. In fact it looks like the trust is gone in this relationship.
Can you bring yourself to forgive and trust her again? I would take a break from this relationship to figure that out. You need time to blow off steam and get your thoughts straightened out.
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