A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok so ill just get straight to the point im 19 and in the Marine Corps my mos is mp and im also working on my bachelor degree in criminal justice my gf is still in highschool and she lives in a small town in the country and the only way kids that live there go to collage is if there parents are loaded well my gfs parents arnt loaded and she hasnt really been thinking about collage and i want here to go she wants to be a nurse and she also wants to get married i keep telling her when i turn 25 and she will be 23 but i think that she is interested in the military paying for school from my gi bill i really do love her and want to be with her forever but i also want her to go to collage but i feel that her getting married at 18 is to young so should i marry her to make sure she gos to school
View related questions:
military Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (27 September 2010):
 First of all let me introduce myself as the husband of TasteofIndia :)
I am a U.S. Marine myself, a 2846 stationed at MCBH Kaneohe Bay, Hawaii. I'm always happy to give a young Devil Dog some advice.
College is extremely important so congratulations to both you and your girlfriend for pursuing your studies. It will make a tremendous difference in both your lives, whether or not you end up together, and whether or not you are a career Marine or just do 4 and out, which is good to go either way. But you are absolutely correct in thinking that you are too young for marriage. Believe me, when I was 19 I thought I was as mature as I was going to get. However, throughout my twenties I actually grew quite a bit. You both have a lot of living to do. I'm not saying you can't be happy together if you do get married early, but you will really limit the things you can do with your lives. Marriage is expensive. And I know how much junior Marines get paid. Not nearly enough! You are going to be separated a ton with deployments, training and getting moved around every 2-3 years. Also, while you can use your GI Bill after being in 2 years, you will need to be in 6 before your dependent can use that benefit. Do you have the Montgomery GI Bill or the Post 9-11 GI Bill? Make sure you know these things before making any big commitments. The most important thing to realize is that marriage is a legally binding contract, and it's certainly not easy to just back out of once you've entered into the bonds of marriage. It's a lot of work, too, and not always fun arguing about things like money and chores. You both really need to be 100% sure before you make that commitment.
Remember that the GI Bill is only one of many options for young people to pay for college. I understand how expensive it is (I have a 4 year degree myself). There are tons of scholarships, grants and other forms of financial assistance available for her. And there is nothing wrong with going to Community College for two years and finishing up at a University, all the while working nights and weekends to pay for it. But it is her education, and it will mean a lot more to her if she is the one who works for it.
So, you are in a committed relationship and love each other. Outstanding. I am not suggesting you break up with her. But this will be an excellent way to test your relationship. Is she committed enough to withstand a deployment, and to deal with your stress brought on by life in the Corps? Are you committed enough to remain faithful when you are out partying with other young women who love the way you look in your Dress Blues? If the relationship can make it through these challenges for 4 or 5 more years (Believe me it will go by fast!) then I think your marriage will last. Wonderful. But if not, hey that's fine... you live and learn and eventually find the right person to marry and start a family. But it may be a big mistake to marry early, especially with the career path you've chosen.
So best of luck to you both. Remember that you're both very young, even if you don't feel like it (when you're older you'll look back and realize how young 19 is.. trust me!) Be patient and everything will work out for the best. Semper Fi.
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (27 September 2010):
 Marriage is a sacred bond and should be treated as such. A couple should only marry out of love and for no other reason.
It is good that you want her to go to school and there are ways to help her with that without rushing into marriage. Talk to her about her options and discuss why she wants to marry so soon.
I hope that helps.
...............................
|
