A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: After my fiance cheated on me we broke up for 2 weeks and in the end i got back with her. Anyway i feel i have moved on after this event but i dont think i feel as strongly for her as i once did. I feel the urge to go out with friends and chase girls. Where i used to crave sex with her i no longer feel the urge as strongly. There are moments where i love her and think shes amazing but i dont get that as frequently. im worried about these feelings and just wondering if you guys think this is just a stage in our relationship where the flame has burnt down a little, (we have now been together around 4 1/2 years) or is it that i dont love her as much?
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broke up, cheated on me, fiance Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2012): I think the first thing you should do is talk to her about the affair and express how you feel. It might make you feel better and help your feelings return. If that doesn't work, it might be time to move on. You've been betrayed and its almost impossible to get over something like that. It completely changes your view of her and the meaning of your relationship. If talking doesn't help, I think you should seriously consider where your relationship is headed and whether or not you wanna continue down that road.
A
female
reader, Basschick +, writes (17 June 2012):
You may still love her on some level, but you have lost respect for her. Since respect is a big part of loving someone I think this relationship is somewhat doomed.
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A
male
reader, Discovery +, writes (17 June 2012):
I'm surprised you're wondering if it's normal and haven't yet ended the relationship. Shows how much she cares for your 4.5 years and affection. I'd never fully trust someone like that again; and without full trust what's the point?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 June 2012):
You'll find this is perfectly normal. Your fiance, the woman you loved, cheated and destroyed your trust. Also, because of she cheated, she's also kind of destroyed the naivety and sparkle of the relationship.
This is actually now the sign that you need to sit down alone and really think about whether this relationship is right for you. Are you willing to sit down with her, explain that you feel the spark has gone and you'd like to work on it with her so the relationship will be stronger, in which case both of you need to be putting effort in?
Or will you conclude that actually this has gone as far as it can and the time has come for you to move on.
Do some thinking.
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