A
female
age
30-35,
*XxLisaxXx
writes:I hate my life. I have never felt so low, I found out my bf of 3 years has been cheating on me for a year and I feel so foolish! It was also with a girl i knew they are not together now but I feel so lonely. I find it hard to trust men after my dad. he was abusive (emotionally mainly) and made it hard for me to trust men. My bf was a guy who allowed me to begin again and see that men aren't all evil and now ... I feel I'm back to sqaure one. I can't communicate with my friends how I feel or my mum. All i do is cry. I'm struggling at work and whenever I'm not there I satying in bed with a bottle of wine all day/night. The only time I left the house was for another bottle.I know I should go to the doctors but I literally can't make myself leave the house. I feel like I have no friends they came to see me once or twice and when I tried to get in touch they are busy or can't make it. I feel so alone and even contemplated suicide last month and the thought still haunts me.Please help me I beg you. My bf still hounds me to this day wanting to be friends. I can't cope anymore. How do I make myself get help when every part of me won't leave my house and when I try I just end up curling up on the floor of my bedroom crying.Yesterday i tried to make myself some breakfast. I was actually going to make myself go to my mums and see if she could help me. I dropped the milk and went hysterical. I went back to my room and didn't leave for the rest of the day.I am hoping by writing on here I am making a mini-step in helping myself. Could anyone please talk to me. Tell me they have been through this or some advice. Will it ever get better? I feel so low.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2009): You are still young why not try to enjoy your single life instead of burying in sorrows over someone who don't really value love?God created you as a a princess, waiting for someone to love you as one.Be strong there are many more things to do in your life instead of wasting your time and energy over this jerk.
A
female
reader, xXxLisaxXx +, writes (16 August 2009):
xXxLisaxXx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou for taking the time to answer. I think this will take me a while to get over. I have been answering people's problems on here for some time. Funny how you can answer other people's problems but when it comes to your own, you feel like there is no answer. I appreiate all your advice, I think my next step is to try and get in touch with my mum and try and talk to her. I think that is the best piece of advice I have had. Thankyou again for taking the time to read my problem. You all make sense in what you say.As for the bf, he is not a friend but it does not stop him pestering me. I can't see myself forgiving him anytime soon.Thankyou again x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2009): Hi there LisaYou are not alone, many people have been going through this, but this is not the answer to your problems. as i read your words i can actually feel your excruitating pain and despair. please your life is so precious, yo are orecious. it may just sound like empty words but you will get through this void and you will SURVIVE this breakup. i also have noted your reponses to posters with their problems. you always want to help, a kind word. so have a kind word for yourself and also help yourself. you can and will succeed. please contact Grimm. Drinking your life away is not he answer. it just gives you a heavy head in the morning (lol). please heed what the aunts and uncles have to say.A big hug and lots of love and kisses from me to you. hang in there kid, it will get better, i promise. be strong.
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A
female
reader, kittykhaos +, writes (15 August 2009):
 Aww babe you really need to try and spend time with your mum i think it would be good for you. You need to go and see a doctor get signed of work for a few weeks. You shouldn't be on your own if you feel this way otherwise it will become a cycle . You are never on your own as alone you as you feel. See this as a small and important step. I have major trust issues too i know how it feels not to trust men but you must understand not all men are this way. As for your x i hope he is your x. Only be friends with him if its on your terms if you want that friendship but i don't think you should let him be anything more. Alcohol is not the answer it is a depresant and in the end it will just make you feel more low. Good luck. If you want to chat i have a skype address dexterbailey. Sometimes when you feel like you can't rely on your friends then a stranger who is objective can be a good person to turn to. x
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (15 August 2009):
 Sweety....drinking and thinking all is lost IS NOT THE ANSWER!You are better than that! This guy does not deserve you and what you have to offer.You need to get some type of therapy for yourself as soon as possible. even if it is some online counseling. I am a victim of cheating myself, and the self destructive behavior your are contemplating has been contemplated by myself in the past.IT IS NOT THE ANSWER.Please feel free to PM me and I can hook you up with some wonderful resources online that you can access with people(Men AND Women) who have been in your same exact position. Trust me, YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS! You need a little cyber hug and you need somebody to talk to. I can help you get the help you need.
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A
female
reader, becca b +, writes (15 August 2009):
get counselling and if you cant bring yourself out of the house then use the phone or email, make sure the counseller is a female though otherwise it will just make it worse if you ever need to talk just do it by email to me.tell that man to leave you alone till you get some help and then he should understand and leave you to make the first move. counselling will help just take it step by step and you will eventually get back to normal with a better partner, who has most likely been through the same thing. but don't start counselling while drunk. starting from now. here's a few steps for you.Step 1- Take a shower.Step 2- Get rid of all alcohol in your house and buy no more.Step 3- Get a FEMALE counseller.Step 4- do everything she says.Step 5- forgive anyone who upsets you. (Take your time though).Step 6- Think this one for yourself.i hope this helps you. if it does or it doesn't help you please let me know.Beccaxxxxx
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