A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im an 18 year old male. i have a girlfriend and my friend is so messed up and says stuff to her behind my back. he asks her to send him sexual pictures. he asks her for kisses to cheer him up. and to bite her ass and stuff. the thing is i promised her i wouldnt confront him because he used to date her bestfriend and she doesnt want to mess up her and her bestfriends friendship so basically i have to pretend hes my friend and every single time his name pops up on her phone i get so mad because i dont want her speaking to him. she knows and understands why it bothers me. but she doesnt want to stop speaking to him because he will be suspicious. she is 100% dedicated to me but im like in a lose lose situation because she wont stop speaking to him. im not concerned about me and his friendhsip because hes messed up and doesnt deserve my friendship anyways. but this always makes me mad and sad and i cant do anything to control it. what should i do to make them not speak? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell the problem with her telling him off is that is she does so her bestfriend which is his ex. will find out and she doesnt want to mess anything up with her friendship. and this happened weeks ago so if the friend finds out she will feel she was hiding it from her and therefore she feels the need to keep faking a friendship to avoid all conflict.
A
female
reader, girl from bristol  +, writes (31 January 2010):
hi she should understand your feelings and you should be most important person you cant force her too stop speaking to him but i dont think she is the girl for you if she cant understand your point of view and does not see anything wrong with what he is doing
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A
female
reader, sick  +, writes (31 January 2010):
i hate to mess up your head but here's my take on your issue:if i knew my bestfriend was still in love with a guy and he was he was hitting on me, i would avoid him and cut all contact with him.so take it from there.
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A
female
reader, Gridrebel +, writes (31 January 2010):
 You say your gf is 100% dedicated to you but you are wrong. She is dedicated to her friend and this guy. She is more concerned with their feelings than yours. She needs to grow a backbone and tell this schlob to back off. Regardless of her being with or without you. If she can't see that her acceptance of this guys bad behavior is just wrong, maybe she isn't the girl for you.
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