A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am a freshman in college. I met this Cuban guy in the Finacial aid office and I have been thinking of him ever since...... I had a little crush on him. Two months later I saw him again at the library, and he said I wonder why I keep running into you? He told me he thought I was very cool and asked for my number. He texted me everyday for a week straight. Then he asked me could he meet outside of school and do homework. Of course I said yes! Finally he calls me, and says he coming to pick me up. I am like okay but I am freaking outside because I know when I really like someone I have a hard time being myself and I give out mixed signals. Also I only had one boyfriend and we were together since my junior year junior year of high school. We broke up three months ago, and besides him I have very little dating experience and I am not sure of what I should and shouldn't do. By the way this guy has an amazing personality. He is full of life, positive, nice, and he has all the qualities I want in a guy. So we finally get to his house. He introduces me to his mom, she was so nice. He told me about his family. He said he wanted a girlfriend and that he likes being around me. He made me some food, and brought it to me. He was so freaking nice and he wasn't a push over. Then, we are talking and I look up and it is 1 am. I have been here for 6 hours and I liked being there s much I did not want to go home. So he asked do I want to stay the night. I said sure, I thought we would watch a movie than go to sleep. He tried to kiss me. I freaked out on him and told him to take me home now. I yelled at him a little bit too. I looked at him and he looked freaked out. He hasn't called me sense. He went from calling and texting me everyday to nothing. I still really like him, and I think I over reacted. What can I do??????
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female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 You like him, and he sure likes you, not every girl gets taken home to meet mum. Your young, and not experienced, so you reacted badly when he made a move on you. Somehow, it sounds like this guy likes you for your personality, not just your looks. Well, freaking out sometimes is your personality right now. Call him and explain that your not used to dating, and you reacted badly because you didn't know how to handle things. At the moment, he probably feels worst than you. He probably thinks he messed up badly and you must think that he's a rapist. Call him up and explain your reactions, just like you told us here. Remember to tell him thank you, send regards to his mother, and tell him you think he's cute and it would be nice to see him again.
He sounds nice. I think he's worth a phone call.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 November 2011):
 Yeah, I don't think you can fix this one. Your reaction was so over the top and you sent many mixed signals, the poor guy might think you are just not a good fit for him at all.
Honestly, why did you freak out?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 November 2011):
I'm going to be honest - I don't think you're going to be able to fix this one. Literally this couldn't have gone worse. For a week, you two texted, then you met up. You met his mother and stayed at the house well into the night (that's a pretty big hint to a man!), and then when he went to kiss you, you totally freaked out, yelled at him and such. You really, really overreacted, and you hugely humiliated him (possible in front of his family).
And, as others have said, it doesn't seem like you tried to fix this. No 'sorry', no nothing.
From a man's point of view, this would be a very bad sign. I think you humiliated him, and I don't think you'll be able to fix it.
Move on.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 You hurt and humiliated this guy.
You stay in his house till 1 am on the first date, what does that mean? Of course you're hinting that you like him! If you thought the kiss was inappropriate, you could have just stopped him and asked him to slow down. Yelling makes no sense, because that makes it look like he was forcing himself on you, but the truth is, YOU were voluntarily at his place at 1 in the morning.
Talk to him, explain why you reacted like the way you did, because right now he's probably feeling rotten inside. Put things right and henceforth don't let things come to this extent. Clarify your stand beforehand, rather than creating a scene later
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (16 November 2011):
 I thought you found everything about him amazing and you're really into him? why did you react so violently? you hurt his feelings. Go find him and talk to him and explain that you like him despite your reaction, and probably why you reacted that way. if he's moving too fast (i'd say meeting the mom should have been more of a freak out but who am i) you have to let him know. also doesn't sound like you've been making an effort to remedy this (have you initated any contact?), making him think you're really not into this. set the record straight.
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