A
female
age
30-35,
*utter
writes:I'm so pathetic I can't even get a boyfriend. When i finally do, everything always turns bad. I am 19 and have aspergers syndrome so people generally think i'm wierd, although i have no problems talking to guys as friends. My best friend just got married (she's the same age as me), and my brother and most of my friends have partners who they're really happy with. I really want a boyfriend but i'm doing everything wrong, because everytime i start to get the feeling a guy likes me, or i like them, they run away. I hate being jealous of my friends and my brother, and although i am happy for them i get really mad about it. Who can tell me what i'm doing wrong?
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female
reader, Cutter +, writes (17 April 2009):
Cutter is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks guys for the support. Not many people know that i have aspergers, it's usually something i keep to myself.
i guess i do get a bit obsessive and need to learn to back off.
A
female
reader, wonderingcat  +, writes (8 April 2009):
 Have you told people (and that includes your friends) that you have Asperger's Disorder?
I'm sure it is difficult for you to see people that you like "run away" as soon as they get to know you better ... or so they thought. But if you educate them of your condition, I am sure those who have sincere and real interest to be your friend or boyfriend, will be more curious to know more about you. In a god way of course.
So my suggestion is, as soon as you you get to know someone, you inform them that you have this disorder. It is nothing to be ashamed about anyways. Have leaflets and brochures, or printouts from reputable sites, ready to show your friends, to educate them of Asperger's syndrome.
You are who you are. And if they then still "run away" from you, then you should be thankful, because you certainly do not want to be friends with people who do not want to be friends with you. Right? It's the same with lets say, if you were gay . If you said you were gay, and they said "eewww", would you want to be friends with them? But if they said, "so what" then you know that to them what matters most is what is inside you, your beautiful mind, your intelligence, your weirdness, your lovely hair, and so on and so forth. Not your "gayness" (if there is such as phrase lol).
So for the moment, just enjoy your time in this earth. Some where, some time, some one will be there for you, to be the partner for life for you.
Cat
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2009): Hi chick.
You obviously havent found the right man yet! Dont worry about it, this happens 2 most girls due to most men being a bit weary about getting in a relationship. I wouldnt worry as of yet. Dont look for a man wait for them to come 2 u. And dont get 2 obsessive and scare them off, if u have been doing this it could of been ur problem? You are only 19 u have the rest of ur life 2 find a man. Have fun whilst ur young, because in my opinion it all goes downhill when u get a partner lol xx
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