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Does personality matter?

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 May 2012) 13 Answers - (Newest, 14 May 2012)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

If a guy is just average looking or even a little ugly (not like hideous ugly), but they have what you consider to be a really funny personality, you get along with them really well, you love to talk to them for hours, they have a cute personality, and is more interesting, would you date them over a guy that has good looks but is really boring?

What if you like the personality of the good looking guy but you like the personality of the average looking guy better?

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A female reader, Shadow Rose United States +, writes (14 May 2012):

Shadow Rose agony auntI'd date a guy with a personality before a boring guy.

That's why I love my boyfriend so much. He's awesome.

Personality is extremely important. Especially for long-term relationships.

And honestly, Great Personality + Time= Looks get better and better in the eyes of a woman.

In a relationship, eventually you'll start to find that person hotter and hotter as your love grows, and after a while, there's no issue of whether or not your significant other is hot. They just are.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (14 May 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntmy current partner is not drop dead handsome... he's short... he's got bad teeth... he wears his hair very short... he has glasses... and I think he's the best thing in the world... his personality grabbed my attention first... but his personality was so cute that I saw CUTE from the beginning...

while personality won't override hideously ugly and deformed for a love life (it will make some great friendships happen) if you are moderately attractive I think that personalty goes a very very long way

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2012):

Good looks maybe an important factor to attract initial attention BUT in my opinion success, strong personality,generosity, kindness,courage,wit, intellect, cleanliness, good manners,honor,chivalry, which are all treats you can aquire by learning and working on them are 100X more important than good looks to keep a chick.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (14 May 2012):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe not at first glace. We (humans) do judge people we meet by their looks within the first few seconds. However, if you have a great personality and get a change to "show" it off looks can easily becomes secondary, unless the girl is shallow and only WANT a "pretty" bf.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2012):

No, not one bit. Looks are, like, so way more important. Anyone can see that.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2012):

"Does personality matter?"

Personality matters much more than looks. Personality is consistent, looks are transient. One can be reasonably sure that a smart, funny, considerate, personable teenage guy will utlimately grow up to become a smart, funny, considerate, personable 40-year-old. One has no idea which hot-looking teenage guy will over time morph into a

bald, fat, toothless 40-year-old.

Intelligent, insightful, self-respecting persons of any age or gender will always be attracted to the contents of the package as a whole, not just the paper it's wrapped in.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2012):

Looks last for a few moments as some can be absolutely beautiful but have the personality of a spoon, who wants to be with a spoon! Some times people who are very attractive are so in love with themselves they don't even realize everything around them,High maintenance isnt good as the girl will always feel she has to live up to there standards. Where as you could meet and average guy who makes you laugh and smile who isnt all wrapped up in themself and cares about you, treats you like a princess :) if it came down to mr attractive with spoon personailty or mr average who made me smile everyday, mr average would be my guy everyday of the week :-)

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2012):

The cliche is that men place greater importance on physical appearance than women do, and while that may be true to some extent when a guy is single and checking girls out as potential partners, when a relationship develops, personal compatability and simply loving your significant other for who they are is crucial. Looks aren't.

I've had two serious relationships in my life, with women I'd objectively rate as about equal in the looks department. However, the first girl didn't exactly have a pleasant personality, and after a while the fact that I just plain disliked her caused me to stop finding her physically attractive. The second (my wife) is the most beautiful woman in the world as far as I'm concerned. I know, objectively speaking, that isn't true and I don't expect others to see what I see. She's no Megan Fox, but then when I look at Megan Fox I don't get that beautiful warm tingle inside that I get when looking at my wife.

It's a great truth that the more you like someone, the better they look to you. You're young and will learn this as you gain more experience in life. Luckily for us fellas, girls tend to realise this far quicker than men do, so there's no need to feel disadvantaged if you happen not to possess the looks and body of Brad Pitt.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2012):

At the end of the day everyone is different people have different tastes. Personality is important but again that is my opinion other people may prefer someone who is just goodlooking.

A lot of people i know go for personality and a good sense of humour more so than pretty guys, but that's just a select few people i know.

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A female reader, xAx United Kingdom +, writes (13 May 2012):

xAx agony auntI would say it depends on the person. Some people are shallow and selfish so may just go for looks. Others may love your personality and find you good looking even though others disagree. Just because you're not the cliche good looking person, doesn't mean you are ugly to every girl.

Me personally though, I get lots of attention from guys so I know that I can get someone good looking, but it's just an attracting feature for when I meet them for the first time. I know that to have a healthy relationship, I do need to be attracted to them but also I want to be in a loving, respectful relationship which you get from building a connection with someone so they need to have a personality I like! I think I should also add that my first big relationship was with my best mate, who I was friends with 3 years prior to going out with him. I didnt find him good looking until I realised the connection we had and just fell in love with him. When with him, l thought he was the best looking guy ever as I loved him for who he was but honestly, he was what would be considered average looking. So yeah, it really depends on the person! I hope my babble helped! Haha x

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A female reader, eternallyinfinite Canada +, writes (13 May 2012):

"would you date them over a guy that has good looks but is really boring?"

Yes, of course ... there's no point in dating someone who's boring, no matter how physically attractive they are

While looks may be somewhat important (as in, does the person take care of himself/herself?), personality is WAY more important.

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A female reader, Jola100 United Kingdom +, writes (13 May 2012):

What is someone without a personality? If you always just go for the looks, you will never find what you truely want in a relationship :/ Unless you are very lucky and get a good looking guy with an amazing personality... :L hahaha :)

But honestly, personality over looks any day :L x

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A male reader, TrancedRhythmEar Saudi Arabia +, writes (13 May 2012):

TrancedRhythmEar agony auntHey kid read up on david de angelo attraction isnt a choice n u will learn how to attract women with personality. In my day brods were superficial so i had bad luck. But frustration with all that was changed positively into a new body n mind. Its much easier now for me to get women. Still catching up but gettin there. Personality matters as u get older so develop it and humor will attract ladies tho that was never my case before.

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