A
female
age
30-35,
*ylove09
writes: My boyfriend and i been arguing a lot lately, he said he wanted a break and i said no, i don't believe in being an option. i said it was over n i wish him the best. we both hung up after. he hasn't called or text me since. its been two days. we dated for 27 months. i deleted my fb because i didn't want to see his fb n i know it would've killed me seeing his relationship status change. i found out he deleted his fb also a day after. I keep staring at my phone hoping he comes begging me to take him back, because he told me a white lie and that's the main reason we broke up. but nothing. im so sad. all i been doing is crying. i been good to him. and since he hasn't try to contact me since. makes me feel he never care. oh it was a long distance relationship of 3 hrs.what do you think? he never cared?
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a break, broke up, hasn't called, long distance, text Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 July 2011):
Yep you broke up with him, you need to be the one to try to fix it...
3 hours apart by car is not a horrible distance but it's a pain....
you want him to beg you to come back... why do you need him to show you how he feels? why is that?
ugh big fights long distance are horrible.. I know I had one a few weeks back that almost killed me...
in this case however, you are the one that broke up and while it's nice if the person you broke up with begs you to take them back, it's not going ot happen in many cases...
IF you really think this relationship is worth it and you really want to make it work, then you need to take the action necessary...
but think long and hard at your age if you can make this LDR work.... and if so when would it end...
A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (5 July 2011):
I am afraid this is a case of say what you mean and mean what you say. You should dump a man only when you WANT to dump him and are willing and prepared to live your life without him. But, apparently, you just wanted to give him a good scare, you wanted to flex muscles.. and it backfired, he took you literally.
If you regret your decision, it's up to you to go after him and ask him a second chance, because you are the one who broke up, and you are the one that should risk rejection. If he does not come immediately to beg you on his knees, it does not mean he never cared. It means either he thinks too it's best to move on, or he does not ,but he has a dignity and he cares about it.
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A
female
reader, DanceInTheDark +, writes (5 July 2011):
You broke up with him, you're the one who has to go BEGGING TO HIM to take YOU back.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (5 July 2011):
I think, first of all, you have to realize that you did dump him, and that because you dumped him he is under absolutely no obligation to contact you or come begging. And no man (or woman) should have to come begging if they have been dumped. If you dump someone, you have to accept that you were the one who ended it, and therefore if you want someone back you are the one who as to make the first move. The dumped person is never obligated to come crawling.
That said, there were obviously real problems here before you two broke up anyway. You were in an LDR, which are hard to maintain anyway, and in truth he wanted a break - meaning that he was having major second thoughts about the relationship before you were. Truth is, it was probably going to end anyway. I think you were right to call time on the relationship, even if you are right to be sitting there wanting him to crawl back.
This is your opportunity now to move on with your life. What you two had was gone, and neither of you seemed willing to work it out in a mature way. He wanted a break, and you have just dumped him yet expect him to come crawling. On that basis, there is little to salvage. Stop waiting for him to call, and move on.
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