A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Help! I think I want to get back with partner and I know he definitely wants to make another go of it with me. We were together for 4 years and split in February though have kept in touch a few times by text. He's a really nice, honourable guy and we get along great. Deep down I really do miss him and I know he totally thinks the world of me. After been apart for 6 months some of my feelings for him have faded - would I be able to get these back? I do know that neither one of us has seen anyone else whilst we have been apart.How will I know if it will work out this time?We have both agreed to do things differently and not take each other for granted. Do I take a chance in life and see if it could work out?Many thanks.
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male
reader, Charlie84  +, writes (19 August 2007):
Build upon what broke you up in the first place. Understanding what was wrong is the key to making it work in the next run. If the problems arise again you may just want to cut your losses and accept that no matter how great that relationship was on the surface that deep down in the guts of the relationship its not meant to work and no amount of work can change that.
Relationships that work like they should will be free of challenges and hard work. The truly great relationships are the ones that come with ease of mind and require little to no overwhelming investment of effort of emotion to fix any wrongs. Not to say there are not going to be flaws because we're all human and in that we're written with flaws in mind.
In the end don't hold on too tight to one love in thoughts of there never being another love of the same caliber that will come along. Neither of you have dated another person since breaking up so you don't know if you'll find something greater and vice versa. If you want it, go for it. But don't be destroyed if it doesn't work out for the better this go around.
A
male
reader, thedude77793 +, writes (19 August 2007):
well if you loved him enough take the chance as you might regret it later in your life but you must think about why you split up with him in the first place and think about what you can do thats different this time round.
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A
female
reader, so sick +, writes (18 August 2007):
I think you should try it with him and see how it feels. I DO think you will get these feelings back asap once you are with him. HOWEVER...you two need to deal and decide what you are going to do about why you actually broke up in the first place? Is there any unresolved feelings from the relationship earlier that needs to be addressed?
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A
male
reader, somewhat_anonymous +, writes (18 August 2007):
It could have just been that you needed a break from each other. You will probably get those feelings back in time, and you don't know that it will work this time, but if everything you said about him is truth and not just what you see, there is a good chance it will work out.
I have a friend who was seeing the same girl since the end of our junior year in high school (1997). When they were seniors in college (2002), they decided to take a break, but pretty much knew they'd get back together. They just needed space and even saw other people. They got back together about six months later and have been together ever since. In fact they got married about a year ago.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (18 August 2007):
 Hi
Ooooh a tricky one this.
Well, if you split on good terms & you think there is a possibility it will work this time, why not take the gamble?
Ive never actually got back with an ex so i have no idea what its like! Nearly did a couple of years ago, we had been split 2 years! But we split because he was younb & he hadnt grown up in 2 years so i thought better of it! We're still talking mates if we see each other out though.
But as long as you still fancy the guy & know you need to address the problems that caused you to split in the first place, then why not?
Let us know what you decide to do.
C xxxxx
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