A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Is it true that guys actually respect girls who have never had sex or if they haven't done much with a guy? I don't want to sound rude, but i don't believe this. I hear guys talk and surely if some girls are rude about the girls who are virgins, then why would guys be any different in their reactions? Also, I mean do guys mind if the girl is a virgin and why or why not? I'm just interested, because i heard someone mention it and i was surprised to know if this was true!? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, ben345  +, writes (15 April 2011):
Not all guys want a slutty girl with loads of experience. I find shy, private and modest girls cute and very attractive.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2011): Guys are not girls. You can't assume they think alike on this stuff AT ALL.
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A
male
reader, Odds  +, writes (13 April 2011):
 "I don't want to sound rude, but i don't believe this."
Men and women are very different, both in our hardwiring and in our experiences. One of the main reasons we get confused is that we project our own feelings onto the other person. Sexual experience is a big one.
But think of it this way. Most guys have a hard time getting a new girl to have sex with them. The guys that have it easy are admired because it takes skill, charisma, and effort to do so.
For girls, it's the opposite. It's easy for any girl to get a new guy to sleep with them. But with so many guys implicitly offering sex at parties, bars, or wherever (when a guy says "Hi!" to a pretty girl, he's either implicitly offering sex or wants to know what time it is), it can be very difficult for a girl to maintain her chastity. The girls that can have self-control, respect for the their bodies, and high standards, so they are admired.
There is also the fact that a virgin, by definition, has not had a dozen flings with bikers and musicians before settling for a boring nice guy. That helps a lot; when a virgin dates a decent man, the man knows she's doing it for him.
So, guys respect and admire female virgins. There are, however, two components to his.
The most obvious one is guys' desire to be her first. This is a tremendously validating feeling for any man, player or not, and for a relationship-minded guy is a sure sign that she cares for him in return.
The second component doesn't usually show until a girl has made it clear to a particular guy that she is not currently interested in him. That's when you get the real respect and admiration for the woman's character and strength of will.
Don't get me wrong, there are some guys out there who prefer girls with experience (whether that's two or two hundred guys) to sleep with, for a variety of reasons, but I doubt you could find more than a handful of guys who don't respect virgins.
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A
female
reader, SweetSmoochy +, writes (13 April 2011):
 No one can speak for all men, but, yes, generally a lady with the confidence to keep her virginity until she finds someone worth giving it to is respected by both guys and girls alike. Immature people are intimidated by that kind of confidence, so they are probably the ones you are hearing talk rudely about virgin girls.
As far as liking virgins, if you were a guy, wouldn't you be happy to know that the lady you are with has respected and saved herself for a special guy? Wouldn't you feel honored if that special guy was you? That's how a lot of the guys I am friends with feel on the issue.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2011): we, men adore virgins. so no issue at all. you can remain virgin till your marriage.
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A
male
reader, no_way_out +, writes (13 April 2011):
I think some girls might be rude about other girls who are virgins...because they may be jealous. Many may have bitter memories of pressures that led them to have sex which led to heartbreak. Those who always attempt the harder thing (and keeping your virginity for most girls is very hard today).
It's crazy that the harder thing that takes the most discipline is mocked in today's society. Keeping your virginity should garner respect, not degradation. It means that you believe sex is sacred and something to be shared with someone with whom you are ready to make a life-long commitment.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2011): I think it's a good thing and would say a slutty girl receives less respect. As for girls being rude of course girls are so catty with other girls usually when they see them as competition.. would I mind no I'd like it..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2011): I'm not a guy bt i do know that most guys out there do respect girls who have never had sex before. Why? Because it shows she has respect for her body. Guys look at girls who throw themselves at other guys as sluts. No guy wants to be with a girl like that. Unless he's just down to have sex then he couldn't care less if you're a virgin or not. But if he's lookin for something more like a relationship then he'l wana girl who doesn't get around.
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A
male
reader, Illithid +, writes (13 April 2011):
 I'm a male virgin, and you bet I'd respect a female virgin. Even friends that are not virgins still respect women that areinexperienced. These girls get to learn, get to experiment, and are very cute. As long as they aren't anti-sex and anti-men, I don't know anyone that would be turned off by that.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (13 April 2011):
The right guy will always respect the right women, regardless of whether she's a virgin or not.
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