A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Do guys lie and say theyre not virgins when they really are? and will theyre guy friends lie for them??because im a virgin and my boyfriend and his friend said he wasnt a virgin .then when we tryed to have sex he could put it in..and he told me to put it in for him.then he kept going to "tha wrong places" so it didnt happen.he said he only done it with one girl,but alot of times.so is it that he lied about being a virgin or hes just unexperinced...? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, PoohDenTheatre +, writes (26 September 2010):
 When I was 24 y/o I was trying to act like I had one GF by then. I guess her definition of having had a GF meant I would have had sex with her but I didn't. This woman who knew me from somewhere in my old neighbourhood publicly exposed Me as a virgin who masturbates alot. I was very ebarrassed about this because it was awfully true.
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (6 September 2010):
 Here's a newsflash us guys lie about almost everything if it suits our needs at the moment.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2010): He might just be bad at sex.. And the girl faked it. Guys who have sex with one girl only who is a faker usually don't know what their doing. The girl feels bad and moans her head off at whatever he does, so he thinks he's ace. I doubt he's lying in this situation. Most guys I know's friends would NEVER lie about that. If they think he's lying even, they will hold it over his head. Unless they know for sure, they won't back him up.
My fiance is amazing at sex, but sometimes even I have to help him put it in and he is EXTREMELY sexually experienced. It's not always an easy thing to do if you're super tight or he's feeling you the wrong way.
Also, maybe he just got used to that girl's special spots and is trying to use them on you. Just be very gentle, DON'T FAKE, and let him know what you want. What you like and dislike. When you want it where you want it and how you want it. Even if he's a sex god, everyone's body is different and he still needs to learn you. My fiance had sex with many girls (which I know for a fact to be true) because he was sexually assaulted as a young kid and it turned him into a sort of sexual deviant until he was 16 (when we met). He definitely knows what he's doing, but it took him quite some time to figure out how to work my body just right.
Just give him time and be honest. Don't pretend to like what isn't good or he will never learn.
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A
male
reader, Scott french  +, writes (4 September 2010):
How old is he? If he is over 18, but he doesnt know how to insert that into a right place then I think he is a virgin. Cause even i am a virgin, i still know where my 'thing 'should go in. By watching porn, all BOYS should know how to 'do'. According to what u said, we can easily tell that he is a virgin , plus he has never ever watched porn. Because as i know, boys start watching porn at the age of 13
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A
female
reader, DearMe  +, writes (4 September 2010):
Yes alot of guys do lie, its just a guy thing. They dont want to be known as a virgin, they want to be able to talk to other guys and have manly talk.
But hopefully he will tell you the truth in the end, i thought my boyfriend had done everything with lots of different girls, but when we talked about it it turns out he handn't. Give him time. then bring it up in a conversation, about how many sexual partners they have had, etc. just bring it up naturally. Theres nothing to worry about though, most guys in this day and age would lie about it.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (3 September 2010):
 Having a problem "putting it in" in itself might not have been an indicator of being a virgin, since if you were a virgin, you'd be a bit tight and he might not have wanted to hurt you. However, putting it in "the wrong places" is something different entirely. I'm guessing he was a virgin. Many guys lie about it both to their friends and to the girl to convey more experience and "manliness" than they possess.
As for his friends lying to you, I'm sure they would be only repeating what your guy told you. he would have lied to them even faster than he would have lied to you.
Normally, I would completely look down on dishonesty of any kind in a guy and would warn you to be careful with him. However, he might have been so desparately trying to impress you and have you look favorably on his manhood that he would have said anything to not have you think little of his sexual abilities. Go gently on him, and reassure him (not in words, necesarrily!) that he is desireable, and no compliment is greater to him than someone like you who would want to make love to him again with enthusiasm.
If you want to, in the future, you could very gently coax him to tell you the truth by being very accepting and happy that you got his virginity as well as he got yours. Don't hold it against him for not being upfront about his experience. He must have really liked you if he wanted so much to impress you!
Now, if he ever starts lying about whereabouts or people he talks to, that's another story. ;)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2010): Yes males lie about not being virgins because according to social norms males are not "real men" until they're sexually experienced.
If he can't even insert his penis in the right place then more likely than not he is a virgin. (:
There's nothing wrong with it, but let him know you appreciate honesty and that you will not judge him, but instead, be supportive.
Please, preferably together, educate yourselves in sex and be cautious.
http://www.scarleteen.com is a clean, educational website to learn about everything you need to know.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 September 2010):
A lot do. I think your boyfriend is. Don't be too hard on him. Clearly you know more about what you're doing than him. Be gentle, and he will learn.
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (3 September 2010):
 Yes guys and girls will lie about that. Usually to gain street cred. Gone are the days when sex was private and between two people who felt strongly about each other. Sex is a way of life now and is over rated on performance by either party.
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