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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I broke up with my ex about 3 months ago. A few weeks later she told me she was pregnant. I was shocked but happy at the same time and we decided to give things another go. At the time I did think it was a bit convenient for her to be pregnant a few weeks after I dumped her. I was also a bit confused that she wasn't really showing signs of early pregnancy like discomfort, cravings etc. She didn't let me go with her to see the midwife and I was also banned from going with her to the scan, for no reason other than she didn't want me there. I didn't even get to see the scan picture cos she said she lost it. Then about a week after the scan she said she had a miscarriage. I was gutted as was she. Once again I wasn't allowed to go with her to the doctors which was really strange. She's now got really clingy and wants to try for another baby as soon as possible, but I'm really suspicious about the 1st 'pregnancy' as is my mother, who thinks she made the whole thing up. Do I confront her about it? If I'm wrong then I risk really upsetting her which I don't wanna do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2010):
i highly doubt this girl was pregnant at all, and I would break it off immediately. Even if she was pregnant, I find it difficult to understand why she would not want you to be present at the medical appointments if she is prepared to have a child with you. She sounds very immature evens if she wasn't lying. I would walk away from this very dangerous and manipulating person. Having a baby is what you do once you know how to have a strong, honest relationship, and she doesn't sound like she has any of those qualities. I can't think of a worse hell than having a child with someone who is prepared to lie to get what they want. It doesn't sound like you love with this girl. Leave, and find someone who respects you and loves you.
A
female
reader, betty_black  +, writes (13 September 2010):
 I would move on.
There is no physical proof she was ever pregnant or had a miscarriage, she is playing on your emotions. Bit of a psycho really! You can do better than this.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2010): If I was in your shoes, I would be even more worried about her getting pregnant on purpose NOW.
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A
male
reader, Presto  +, writes (13 September 2010):
 Hi,
I once had a long time girlfriend that did something similar and a friend of hers came to me and confided in me something that she said to him about me. This resulted in me instantly dumping her and cutting all communication with her. I even moved to another state into a high-rise so she couldn't get to me.
The psychological game that she is playing with you is called "CoDependency" she feels that if she makes you feel guilty enough she can get you to do anything she wants to you so you will go back to her. She wants to control you through your emotions.
Don't confront her. Just move on. You don't even have to go through the formality of saying that you're dumping her, you already went through that.
Ignore her and move on there so many more emotionally intelligent women in the world. Your mother would agree. She'll eventually stop calling. Change your phone number and if she confronts you, don't acknowledge that you know her. "I'm sorry, I don't know you, please leave me alone" works well.
If she goes psycho on you, you can get a restraining order at the local sheriff's office without any fees or a lawyer.
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