A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: So I have been "talking to" a guy for about a month now. We have hung out plenty of times and most recently at a party we hooked up (not all the way) and we "slept together" (again not sex) . Everything was going great he was asking my friends about me (if I liked him) and I could definitely tell this guy was into me. Well its been about 3 days since our party hookup and he has not really contacted me since. I mean we've texted a few times about hanging out again but all his texts are very one word answer and at most recently he wont text back. I was wondering if he lost interest just randomly. Or is this some mind game guys play. I know that he talked to me all the time when he didn't know if I liked him or not. Now that its pretty obvious I do is he ending things? Did he just want to hook up? Im very confused.
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (7 June 2011):
It's early to say, it's only 3 days that he is AWOL, so maybe it means nothing.Maybe he 's busy at work or whatnot.
Yet I feel that you jumped the gun. You got too intimate too soon ( even if not " all the way ") without having the patience to find out if there was compatibility between you and if he even saw you as dating material or not.
Of course he was "into you ", who is that does not like instant gratification, and who'd refuse some nice cuddles , and maybe much more, with any reasonably attractive girl ? BUT people ( not only men ! ) are fickle, some like the thrill of the chase without being particularly into the prey, ... all in all it pays to take it a tad slower and let people come closer to you at a slower pace. Who has the patience to do that, is really into you . Who does not, just wanted , or will want, to kill some time casually.
You may see this as " playing games " , but I don't, I see it simply as being discriminating . After all, when you go shopping for clothes you don't just grab the first garment that catches your eye, right ? You check the price first, you try the dress on and see if it fits, you think if it goes with your accessories, and maybe you think it over a couple of days before the final purchase... shopping for a boy is not that different.
A
female
reader, MissTellAll +, writes (7 June 2011):
Sounds like he may like the chase more than the catch. Maybe he's playing hard to get.
I can't honestly give a definitive answer because of course I'm not him, but it sounds like maybe he's a chaser. I'm sorry for this is he actually does want to be with you and he's just playing hard to get, but then again do you want to be with anyone who's going to play games like this?
Well, I hope this helps.
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