A
male
age
36-40,
*hizzybob
writes:Ok I will try to sum this up quick. I'm currently dating my brother X. My girlfriend had a pretty ruff break up a few years ago with my brother and I pretty much been there for her helping her out in her problems. During that period we became real close and our friendship turned into a serious relationship. Now my brother said he's completely fine about our relationship and he doesn't care what we do. Now the thing is I love this girl and wan't to marry her, but it urks me when I have to think about the sexual relations she use to have with my brother. I don't know if I need to just get over it and move on or what. But I don't think I would feel comfortable being in the same room with him and her at the same time. Just imagine looking across the room at your brother and both u and him and your girl all know that he had his penis inside her pussy. Sometimes I wished that me and my girl never took it to that level because she's hurt now about the situation, and she truly love me and want to be with me, but she says if this is a problem then don't force it. I just need some help and advice because I don't know what to do. But imagine everytime u see your brother and your girl at a bbq or something u going 2 remember he had sex with her in all kinds of way because after all that was his X. Please help me...
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2009): Wow, did you lose your focus or what? You knew she was your brother's girlfriend and all that entailed and NOW you have your brother's penis to worry about? Get real. It sounds to me like you've lost interest in her too.
You need to focus on you and your girlfriend. Shallow thinking about her past relationships is pretty childish. Then again jealousy has reared its ugly head at your home too. You need to man up and assume your problem and bad ideas.
Assume full responsibility for what you have gotten yourself into. It's not The Lord's problem but one of your own making. After all, it is all in your head.
The nerve to now have qualms over what you have done.
A
male
reader, shizzybob +, writes (12 June 2009):
shizzybob is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you Everybody for your assistance I really appreciate it. I will continue to pray about this and get strength from the Lord to overcome this problem..
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (12 June 2009):
 all you can really do is just focus on the you and her and the future you guys have together.
yeah ok your brother probably did stuff with her but she's more focused on you and her together i am sure she doesn't think about the things you do i reckon she is just planning her future with you and her.
forget your brother now he was her past and you're her future.
you just need to try and think positive and move forward rather than think on the past.
i wish you the best of luck.
x hope this helps x
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A
male
reader, Dreamlover  +, writes (12 June 2009):
 not easy i agree, but you need to remember why you fell in love with this chick, Its not cos your brother has had her its cos you see something in her that you love.Focus on that, you may be the one to give her what she needs from a man and not your brother.
I think time apart from him (i mean you and your gf) would be best, So that his not a constant reminder. Move away for a bit and when you and your gf have made the base of your relationship rock solid them in sure you wont mind meeting your brother.
good luck
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