| A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I am 42 and I have only been attracting younger men lately. The youngest recently was 24. I told him that’s way too young for me (only 6 years older than my oldest son) but he keeps trying to tell me why it could work between us. Not buying it. He is nice and all and we have gone out as friends and he knows how to treat a woman but as far as being in a committed relationship with him I don’t know. Do you think it could work? Any ideas for it working? As far as sex, is it ok to consider sex with him? Could it be a good idea for us? Are there some aspects of sex with a younger man that could be good for me as an older woman? Could sex with a younger man be a good experience for me? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, amicalus  +, writes (22 December 2010):
 ask him if it will be a good experience for him too :))))))
funny moments
A
male
reader, soon567  +, writes (21 December 2010):
Never get involve in a relationship playing with other emotions. If this is just sex that your hoping to get out of this then just tell him upfront. I see know reason to hide your intention.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): It really depends on the people involved when there is that much of an age difference as well as on what type of relationship each of you wants and on your life circumstances and careers.
What you both want should be clearly defined in all relationships ahead of time. Unfortunately our wants and expectations can change over time as a relationship develops and the likely hood of having a committed relationship with that age gap is low for most people.
I personally would not date someone that much younger than myself and probably not that much older than myself either.
I think if you want to date someone younger then you should look for someone in their 30's who is probably going to have more life experience and maturity. If it's just a sexual relationship you both want then it could work well, but some emotion could come in to play over time so keep that in mind.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): It is looking good offer but don't think, no one will ever come to know, surely one day it happens through some thing the other way and at that time you will only feel shame and guilty to live life ex: think if your sons/daughters/husband come to know about this relationship what will happens & first you will loose the ever trusted relationship & respect and so on. So don't be like child think positive
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): If at 42 your idea is to be used sexually by a man then I would suggest you undergo some serious introspection and figure out why you think so little of yourself. You are a grown woman ... now its time to grow up. Younger men are out to use you as a Cougar... but not because they see you as powerful... but because you are being targeted as an easy lay. I would find it insulting.
At 50, I've been hit on by high school boys. I'm not sitting around thinking I'm some great sex pot... and whether sex with an 18 year old would be wonderful... frankly boys and young men don't know what they're doing... and, moreover, I think more of myself than to be a piece of ass...
I wasn't a piece when I was younger and I'm not now...
Why on earth are you? Why aren't you pissed off? Why aren't you thinking about the signals you are giving off that would lead to only young guys trying to mess with you?
Come on. Stand up for yourself and act like you've got a head on your shoulders.
...............................
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (20 December 2010):
 As far as sex is concerned, yes, it could be a good idea. Make sure that you're sleeping with each other, instead of himself only taking advantage of you. Or, you taking advantage of him.
As to the relationship, it could be a good idea, or it could be a bad idea. I'm sure you know this, since you're 42.
If a man your age were to ask me whether I think it's a good idea that he starts a relationship with a girl who were 24, I would say, no. I would believe that they would be in two very different stages of life and that other interests, not love, would be the major drivers of the relationship. I would also tell him that, if the relationship were serious at all, with marriage or living together and all, ten years from now he'd be 52 and she'd be 34.
Anyways, it's your call.
...............................
A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (20 December 2010):
 I think it could work. 24 is pretty young, however, some 24 year olds are more mature than others. You should probably take it fairly slow to see if you both want the same things. If you are looking to settle down and he is looking for a roll in the hay, then you'll have to decide if that is the type of relationship you are looking for.
I think a lot of relationships with mixed ages can work, but they also have a lot of risk. You'll have to decide for yourself if this 24-year-old is worth the effort and if he has the maturity that you are looking for.
...............................
A
female
reader, Adorskable +, writes (20 December 2010):
 Have fun if you want to than go for it, enjoy it! Make sure you don't take him to seriously because you don't want to end up getting hurt, just enjoy the ride and go with the thrill.
...............................
A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (20 December 2010):
I second the comments by Cerberus. Lately quite a few women who are a bit older than me have come on to me, in some cases quite aggressively. They aren't looking for anything serious, believe me! If you keep it casual you can have a lot of fun. Just be careful you don't get emotionally attached, because the long term prospects for such a relationship are minimal at best.
...............................
A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (20 December 2010):
 A relationship with a younger man like that is not a bad idea. In fact, it could be quite good for both of you. However, there are things that must be considered before doing so. First, a committed relationship isn't a good idea. Both of you are in totally different places in your life and it should wouldn't end up good. Especially when you have children who are not far from his age. An open, "no strings" relationship is ideal and can work very well. Sex and companionship are really the two main points to a relationship like this but the stress of s serious relationship is not something you really need. You shouldn't need to deal with unnecessary drama at this point.
If he is on the same page as you with this... and only IF, then you should feel comfortable proceeding. At that point, feel free to let yourself go and lose control. He's young and he's got lots of stamina. And guys reach their sexual prime earlier in life. You, on the other hand have lots of things you could teach him and women generally don't reach their sexual prime till later in their life closer to your age.
Bottom line: Don't be afraid to take a chance with him. There's nothing wrong with having a simple, carefree relationship with him with the benefits of sex. Just make sure there's no confusion about a future together between either of you. If you don't think you can have a "no strings" relationship with him because either you or he will get attached, then don't do it.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): Yeah it would be fine as long as you remained casual, casual, casual.
There's nothing at all wrong with it, but a long term serious relationship is not likely. But if you want to have a bit of fun, date this guy and do so casually then yeah you'll probably have great fun.
In fact a lot of single your age would kill to have that opportunity.
You want to have some fun and are not looking for a life partner then go for it I say.
...............................
A
male
reader, serenity80  +, writes (20 December 2010):
Why you don't try it and see? That goes for the sex and the relationship. Age isn't everything. You could meet a man your own age but it doesn't guarantee it will work out. It's all about the chemistry and how you progress together in the relationship. Maybe the age difference would be a good thing in your relationship.
...............................
|
