A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I Need help ! Me and my boyfriend are currently on a break, which was my idea. My reason being was that we were getting in to too many arguments so I wanted some time to myself. But I met this guy the other night, and I really like him, and he feels the same. Would it still be cheating if, say, I kissed him ? Or if we went further than a kiss, while me and my boyfriend are on a break ??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): If you have agreed its just a break then don't complicate it further at this stage. However.... isn't your interest, this soon, in another guy telling you something??? Being honest with yourself is hard - but I think its time you were. Good luck.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (17 October 2007):
 In my humble opinion, when a woman asks for a "break", or "space", the relationship is in serious problems: she wants out. It is clear to me that you no longer love your boyfriend. Tell him so. After you break up with him, you will be able to go out and see what happens with this new guy. But, don't change the order of things: break up first, new guy later.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Perhpas I'm old-fashioned, but a break in a relationship is a broken relationship. You are broken up. Now if you get together later then you have started over. This whole idea that breaks are transitional periods or rest periods is just people trying to keep their options open. But it would be nice if you did tell him that it is a permanent break if you had discussed it as temporary.
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A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (17 October 2007):
 Then you need to speak to him and let him know that at this time you're not getting back together. Going to a party with a guy is OK, as long as you're single. It's cheating if you're just on a break, but planning on getting back together.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (17 October 2007):
 matey, go out with your new bf and have a ball !!
Just do one thing to show you are a nice person. Call your ex bf and tell him you two wont get back together and you hope he meets someone nice - and wish him luck , but you want to move on with your life and meet new people .
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm just really confused, like with me n my boyfriend. I dont fell as though we like each other at all anymore. It's always just argument after argument. And he doesnt like me going out with other friends, unless he is there !
I'm going to a party with this new guy and I wanna have fun, without worrying what my boyfriend will think.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (17 October 2007):
If you're just on a regular break, yes. If you do something with the new guy, make sure the break up is permanent before hand. If you want to play, you're not ready for a relationship anyway.
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A
female
reader, troyssweetie +, writes (17 October 2007):
 guess it depends on what kind of a break it is. if you just wanted some time alone for a bit then yes. i would say that you have cheated. if you didn't end the relationship then it is cheating..........well, that's how i would see it anyway.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2007): Depends on what conditions you guys took a break.
If he is under the impression that you're just looking for time to 'think' or 'be alone' then he might not be happy with you kissing another guy. Well actually he probably wouldn't be happy about you kissing another guy PERIOD.
Talk to your boyfriend about the terms of the break before you go any further. If you're interested in this other guy it's probably best to leave your boyfriend for good.
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