A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating my girlfriend for a year now, and things are really great. My problem is that I found out that she used to be very permiscuous. She was also a substance abuser. I dont believe she has ever cheated on me, but my imagination gets the best of me sometimes. If a woman was very permiscuous, can she be trusted to be faithful now? She has more guy friends than girl friends, and I cant help but wonder if she was intimate with any of them. I've never been a trusting person, but I love her and I want to make this work.
View related questions:
cheated on me Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2009): I'm going to say something that the whole world wants to think isn't really true: Her past is a bad sign.
She may be totally faithful and totally a different person from who she was back then. From now on she may always be who you want and hope for and not who she was.
Or she may not, she may be struggling to be this newer person and she will revert to her old ways sooner or later. Every person is different. Don't assume anything bad without some evidence of it, but just keep your guard up and your eyes & ears peeled for a while.
It's a good sign if she has already been "the new her" for a while. It would really help if she'd already had a decent healthy relationship with at least one other guy before you since the change too.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (27 September 2009):
Well you love her and that really is a great start. Remember that everyone in the world comes with some sort of past. Your girlfriend was a substance abuser and was permiscuous. But she's committed to you and you've been together for a year. Go for it.
...............................
A
female
reader, MissKin +, writes (27 September 2009):
 If you love her - trust her. And if she loves you, if you really know she loves you - you should have nothing to worry about. And thinking up things that you CAN worry about, will only lead to disaster. Don't think about the what-if's, just think about how things are now. People change. she WAS that way. and now she's with you.
Just be happy with what you have and don't look for problems that might not exist without having a reason to.
...............................
|
