A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok before i ask for help i want to make it very clear i am not a nutter pretty much me and my bf are not together any more and we have a newborn baby now he want's to take the baby but i don't want him to have it in saying that i don't want to be a bitch either so i'm looking for someting along the lines of a nanny cam/ hidden camera to see how he gets on pretty much thats portable and once i no she ok i stop using it he refuses to mind baby in the house so plz i looking for a hidden portable video cam or something if thats failing anyone no about human gps ???
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (11 August 2011):
 if you don't trust him to see the baby alone what are your reasons?
IF you have valid reasons (he's an alcoholic or drug addict or has prior situations of child endangerment) perhaps you can have the courts intervene...
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (11 August 2011):
 Well why dont you want him to take the baby? What are your reasons?
At the moment you do sound like a nutter, you havent given any valid reasons why you think he is a bad father or would be a danger to the child. This is his baby too, you cant deny him from having access to the child unless there were some very serious concerns over his ability to look after a child i.e. he is on drugs, an alcoholic, abusive...etc.
Speak to a lawyer and draw up a proper access plan, so you can both be happy with the arrangements, the child will get to see mummy and daddy regularly, and you dont have to stalk your ex like a crazy lady.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
male
reader, idoneitagain  +, writes (11 August 2011):
Unfortunately for you, what you are proposing is not legal. Firstly, it may not be a question of you being a bitch or not being a bitch which determines whether or not he gets to take the baby at times. This may be his legal right as the father, he may have the right to take the baby at times, even if you have sole custody of the child. You would be wise to get legal advice on this based on where you live, as different locations have different rules.
Additionally, it is not legal for you to use a hidden camera to monitor things without his knowledge and consent. This is an invasion of his privacy.
If you have reasons to worry about your child's safety, for example if your ex drinks a lot, does drugs or is violent, you should get legal advice immidiately.
If he isn't putting your child in danger, and you are asking this question because you just want to make sure everything is ok with your child, and are nervous about letting anyone else care for baby, you can speak to him about your concerns you have about whether he actually knows how to care for a child. As a new mother, you probably didn't know how to care for a child at first, and are having to learn as you go. It is the same for him as a new father, he has to learn how to be a father.
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A
male
reader, Kyle007 +, writes (11 August 2011):
Um, yeah, if you can't trust him with the baby don't let him take the baby anywhere, and legally make it so. What are you going to do, if something goes wrong? Just watch it on video?
Even if you could get a camera on him, find out if this is legal. Its probably not. And if not, then its not admissable in court as evidence if he does something wrong.
Who cares about whether or not you want to be a bitch. If you have to in order to protect your kid, then that is what it takes.
I am assuming this person is not trustworthy with the kid and/or you are worried he will take the kid away permanently?
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