A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I feel kind of silly asking this, but could anyone give me a suggestion on a good place to meet guys?I don't go to school anymore, and I don't work in an environment in which I'd meet anyone that I'd want to date. Guys in bars and clubs seem to only be looking for that one thing, and I've tried online dating sites, but frankly the men on those sites just aren't physically attractive.I'm pretty, intelligent, and I feel like I'd be a good 'catch', I just can't seem to find the fodder to spark that flame.It's getting frustrating, because I'm sick of being single.
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male
reader, borna +, writes (16 August 2008):
Local libraries are pretty good communities if you want to meet intellectual people. libraries have group activities like reading sessions, etc.
coffee shops, specially the one around universities and also the one inside a bookshop (Barnes & Nobles) are also fine places.
And there are various community service activities that you can meet responsible and interesting people.
A
female
reader, les +, writes (15 August 2008):
Hey,
I know how you feel about bars and clubs, but contrary to most people, I think they are a pretty good idea, as long as you combine it with other activities, like hobbies, suggested here.
The trick to meeting decent guys at bars is where you go, when you and who you go with. If you go on a Thur-Sat night out with your girlfriends dressed like a hoochie surround by drunk guys - yes, you're going to get a very low quality of men.
However, if you go on a weekday to a happy hour at a bar near a university or in the business district of your town, dressed nicely, you are going to meet young working professionals grabbing a drink after work to relax. No one is drunk at this point so its a perfect opportunity to start a conversation with someone.
Also, sports teams. I live on the east coast and a lot of grad students/working professionals join soccer or softball leagues - there are notorious for kindling romances. If there isn't one in your area and you enjoy playing sports.. why don't you start a league or a team? Guys love soccer...
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A
male
reader, Ed1337  +, writes (15 August 2008):
 Someone suggested playing EVE online, don't waste your life away infront of a PC, you will never have a social life again.
I'm in a similar situation, my job is in the automotive industry and very few of our customers are female. I'm in the office a lot with two others who are old enough to be my parents. The money is good but i'm really considering handing my notice in, just so I can work with people my own age.
Not everyone who go to bars are just interested in sex, it really depends on what bar you go to. A great time to meet guys would be on a pool night down a local pub/bar.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (15 August 2008):
 Agreed. Bars + clubs = the guys are there most often for casual sex. And once they've got that, they're unlikely to stick around.
Some (random) suggestions:
- Join a club / group of some sort. Anything from sports, marshall arts and yoga, to language classes or some kind of local charity / help group.
- Join a band! (if you can play an instrument)
- Play Eve Online (it has 96% male players and is much more 'grown up' than World of Warcraft or similar)
- Get a saturday job somewhere where you think you might meet a lot of guys. Somewhere where the customers will often talk to the staff, or in a very social company.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (15 August 2008):
 I know alot of people meet in bars and clubs, but personally i would steer clear of these type of places. Invariable people who have been drinking are never themselves. I think a good place to start would be to start a course or an evening class in something that you enjoy. When you meet people at at things like this you both share a common interest. going to the gym is another good place, or have you tried organised singles quiz nights. The likellhood is that we meet our potential partners when we very least expect it.
All the best x
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A
female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (15 August 2008):
 Try myspace or facebook for online as most people on there r pretty trendy and cute or i would say through your friends...get them to set you up or go on double dates with there boyfriend and his mate...let your friends know your on the look out and im sure there have a few to line you up with. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (15 August 2008):
Hmm I think that leaves joining a group of some sort of activity or hobby you like. That way you'll meet someone who you have atleast 1 common interest with. Also, you could ask friends to set you up with any of there friends or bf's friends or any single guys they know.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2008): Have you tried a new hobby that involves a club environment?
In the past I've been a member of a few Sub-Aqua clubs and I've lost count of the number of relationships and occasionally marriages that have occurred between members.
Maybe it's something to do with seeing all that bare flesh and curves underneath swimming costumes on pool nights.
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