A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 23 she is 21 .We both r in college.I am in deep love with this girl who was in relationship with 2 boys before me.I am a really intelligent guy who has a balding problem and an irregular shape(i ll fix that).the last boyfriend ditched her after sex without offering any reason.the one before that looked forward to a relationship with her best friend.she considers the last boyfriend as a real love from her side at least ,is bitter about the experience, and still recalls those days as the happiest days in her life.also she feels she has cheated her parents for this boy.She is also proud that the boy was and is a drunkard but not when he was in love with her.He pursued her for 1 year before she said yes.also she has most of her friends boys which actually disturbed me for quite some time but i took it in stride after being a bit sulked for sometime.The reason was that after we met we became good friends.Then i proposed her she refused.she knew i had feelings and she runs away from me coz she says i will suffer later for the time i spend with her.She doesnt want this to happen.So she avoided me and whatever small time we had to be together was eaten up my som other guy and therefore i grew jealous.I am offering everything I have to support her.But she just overlooks my help and stuff.The calls she evr made was to say sorry that she didnt value my help and stuff. I cant logically see someone as accepting as helping and top it all as loving as me.The drunkard boy she was with --she had no future at all while she is an ok student.And with me-i m the one with a bright future which i m putting to dust while pursuing her ,crying for her ,waiting for her.My heart sinks thinking once college is over I wont be able to see her again.Should I leave her because there are actually much better options available for me...but the thing is that those options are not my love.How to make her fall in love with me??Any assessments ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey who said i m in love with a foreign girli m in india.i m going to continue my relation with her strictly as a friend.i know that all your ur response is unanimous-leave her.i will be forced to do that once college days are over.for now only friendship...i love being taken advantage of..let it be that way...anyway thanks to all.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): You say you have an irregular shape? So I take it that you are neither a regular polyhedron or a platonic solid? Your body seems to present us with a wonderfully mysterious geometric puzzle. Approximately how many sides would you say you have?Regarding your problem...You are Indian, right? As such, you need to drop the crazy foreign girl and find yourself a nice, well behaved Indian girl who knows the rules. This is the only way for you otherwise you will drive yourself crazy, your engineering/information technology studies will suffer and you will lose your big opportunity to gain temporary work status or permanent residency in one of the developed nations. Just think of the humiliation you will bring to your parents and family if do not perfectly conform to their rigid expectations, because you got tangled up with a silly foreign girl!
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A
female
reader, Kendra0589  +, writes (14 October 2009):
 It's imposssible to make someone fall in love with you. I agree it is disturbing to have feelings for someone but all they do is ignore you in return. Trust me I know how it feels. You are trying to help her and she just doesn't see it right now because she is busy running behind guys that don't know how to treat her. I admire you for being a good friend to her despite having feelings for her. The best advice I can give to you is to move on. Don't stop being there for her but I think you should give her some space. Right now you're setting yourself up to get crushed. When school ends you still be holding on to feelings for some1 that could care less. You deserve better. In the end she will she what she has lost. Remeber the saying some people don't realize what they had until it's gone?
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A
male
reader, Heartbroken in love +, writes (14 October 2009):
go with the better options man. this girl dsnt appreciate wut u do for her. at the very least u shud stop doing anything for her. now when u do this she may try to show a little attention to you and get you to fall in the trap again but u will be better off not falling for it. good luck my friend
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): It seems like this girl is really confused about how she feels and what she wants. You are young and you have your whole life ahead of you. This girl has not given you any commitment, only mixed messages. You can't throw away all the wonderful opportunities at your door, ones that you have worked for, unless you know that the alternative is a safe investment. And, by your post, I am sure that you don't think she is a safe investment. If she was, there would be no reason to write a post such as this one.You can't get her to love you. Love is something she has to feel on her own. I have been in a couple of bad situations in my life where I felt soo strongly about the person I was with or wanted to be with that I was willing to give up everything else in my life. I am lucky that I didn't make the wrong decision in those cases because looking back I see now that I was forcing something that wasn't there and that I was in love with the idea of the person and not actually them.Cease the opportunities at your doorstep and if this girl is the right one, she will encourage you and perhaps even follow you, because that is what love is...that is the way a loving relationship works.Best of luck.
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A
male
reader, Heartbroken in love +, writes (14 October 2009):
go with the better options man. this girl dsnt appreciate wut u do for her. at the very least u shud stop doing anything for her. now when u do this she may try to show a little attention to you and get you to fall in the trap again but u will be better off not falling for it. good luck my friend
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