A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I recently met someone online who pursued me like crazy for about a month, we had a great mental connection as he could even finish my sentences for me. Well before meeting we ended up having virtual sex online. Just describing what each would do to the other, and it was nice but also got to me emotionally. Anyhow we met for the first time and had a wonderful day, but no intimate contact except a kiss at the end of the date.after that he became kind of distant for about 4 days, then got back to me and explained he was contemplating a relationship, but the distance was a bit much to handle, and if we could be friends, not with benefits as he knew i deserved better, and he didnt want to break my heart, so I agreed , but now he is still chatting to me in the same manner as before.....and it happened again, (very romantic and sensual)... is he interested and wont tell me or just getting his thrill? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011): It could be he is confused about what he really wants but he wants an online sexual relationship for whatever reason, or he is nuts. Why don't you ask him and see why he is saying he wants a friendship, and yet he is still flirting with you.
A
female
reader, LostInMyself +, writes (6 January 2011):
 Hmmm... well.. I can understand your dilemma. It is great that you got along IRL , but I know you understand how intimacy is linked to emotions.
I think the answer comes more from what you feel.
If you are not interested in a relationship with him, and you feel comfortable with it.. then having cyber sex with him is okay.
On the other hand, if you have feelings for him, and you keep having intimacy (even if it is "cyber") and he already told you he does not want to handle the relationship right now...then you are setting yourself up for trouble because you may end up getting attached to him, and he may not want something serious.
I would keep an eye out for emotions, if he wants to be friends as he said, then I think maybe giving him space and not allowing the relationship to go further than friendship (i.e no cyber sex) and limiting it seems like a good alternative. When he sees he wont be getting any from you and that you are being distant to him, it could go two ways...he either grows disinterested [Which could be a sign that he did not have those feelings towards you] OR realizes he needs you in his life or that he may lose you and he has to do something he could realize that he wants to try a relationship out... :)
Good luck, please be patient and be careful with your feelings :)
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A
female
reader, LostInMyself +, writes (6 January 2011):
Hmmm... well.. I can understand your dilemma. It is great that you got along IRL , but I know you understand how intimacy is linked to emotions. I think the answer comes more from what you feel. If you are not interested in a relationship with him, and you feel comfortable with it.. then having cyber sex with him is okay.On the other hand, if you have feelings for him, and you keep having intimacy (even if it is "cyber") and he already told you he does not want to handle the relationship right now...then you are setting yourself up for trouble because you may end up getting attached to him, and he may not want something serious.I would keep an eye out for emotions, if he wants to be friends as he said, then I think maybe giving him space and not allowing the relationship to go further than friendship (i.e no cyber sex) and limiting it seems like a good alternative. When he sees he wont be getting any from you and that you are being distant to him, it could go two ways...he either grows disinterested [Which could be a sign that he did not have those feelings towards you] OR realizes he needs you in his life or that he may lose you and he has to do something he could realize that he wants to try a relationship out... :)Good luck, please be patient and be careful with your feelings :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011): If you know that the guy is married,quit corresponding with him and get the heck out of his life and not have him mess yours and give a little respect to yourself.most likely the man is in a relationship and he's nit a keeper.
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A
female
reader, lija30 +, writes (6 January 2011):
 I have been online for ever and all I can tell you is 86 percent of all people you talk to online are fakes and phoneis..these people waste your time with false promises and crazy ideas....and wild fantasies...If you love yourself...just go out and put your self in a target rich environment and meet someone that way ....dont believe stuff online ....most people have mental issues...or they cheating , or they perverts trying to get a cheap thrill...dont believe the hype ....save yourself some time......and quit the online relationship thing....go outside...meet a face...and come back and thank me later..*good luck hun* wink
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