A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I can't tell if this guy is interested or not? He says he's busy (he's a dr).I met this guy through friends and we really hit it off when he joined a group of us on a night out. As soon as I got home that night my friends were all calling telling me how into me he was and I added him on facebook. He responded within 10 minutes and we chatted for a while before he said he had to go to sleep as he had to be up at 6am.Then, no contact for a week, until friday night when I saw he was online and initiated chat. He said he was meeting some friends in a bar and invited me to join them in half and hour, also have me his number in case I couldn't find him. We chatted a lot,he kept touching my arm and smiling at me, his friends were nice and he hugged me as he dropped me home and said he would see me on sunday. On sat night something came up for the next day and I texted him to say I wouldn't be able to make our original time the following day but could he meet later. He didn't reply until the next morning, saying he had plans for the rest of the day. No other suggestion.Didn't hear anything for a full week again and thought that was it, when he texted me sunday morning to see if I was awake and going to church. We chatted after the service (at his instigation) and then he said he had to meet a friend. Early evening I texted him to see how his day was and he invited me to see the christmas lights switch on. We walked a round for a bit, went for coffee and chatted. He walked me home and we hugged (initiated by him). He told me he was working crazy hours at the moment but would be in touch.The next week I could see he was sometimes online but he never initiated any contact. I wanted to contact him but I thought if he's online then he knows I am and he's not speaking so I guessed he wasn't interested. Then on sunday night he texted me to ask if I was in the pub with my friends (a regular thing) and came and joined us. We chatted loads again, he seemed to be paying me loads of attention. He offered me a ride home, and also to a couple of my friends. Even though my house was closest he drove the others home first and took the long way back to my place. We chatted and laughed and he said again how busy he was and how much it sucked. He hugged me again when he dropped me off.That was a week ago and this week we have been in touch everyday, by text or facebook chat, initiated by him 80% of the time. I felt like we were finalyy getting somewhere but now it's saturday night, I know he's not working tonight because yesterday he mentioned how he was working the day today) and I've heard nothing. I am sitting at home with a takeaway watching TV.The oddest thing is that when we meet up we get on so well and he only lives 10 mintues walk from me. It's not like we need to make some huge date plan, he could just invite me over, or for a drink or come round here for takeout but he doesn't seem to get that. Also, he can't be busy every single day? He must know of one day where he's free and we could make a plan?Should I tell him this or wait and see?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2009): my first hunch is he doesnt like u as u like him,maybe he sees u as a friend,if he wants things to happen, he will make the move, my advice is being friend with him, but dont expect too much and live ur life.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2009): If he is contacting you 80% of the time, then i would say that he likes you. Why not invite him over one night for a takeaway
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A
female
reader, Dr Bex +, writes (5 December 2009):
Hmm I think its completely obvious that he likes you. Maybe he is just not wanting to come across too eager. Us girls like someone who plays it cool yet when we don't hear we become frustrated. Maybe he doesn't know how to be and therefore thinks playing it safe is the best option. Remember he may not know just how much you like him. Why don't you initiate the a date. Maybe casually text him asking how he is and if he's free soon for a drink. Sometimes we have to take control. He might really like it that you've taken the initiative. You have nothing to lose. Good luck darling.
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A
female
reader, Shan25  +, writes (5 December 2009):
Are you for real its so clear that he wants one thing from you. you can sugar code it anyway you want but he is not interested and texting and internet chat is so clear its nothing you do know guys do calling girls that they want. to hear your voice to learn your re actions to the conversation. move on because he knows you are interested and will give it up because you still like him after he kept dissing you. good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2009): Why does he have to do all the initiating and make all the effort? If you keep leaving it to him he's going to think you're not interested and he'll give up.You say he's a doctor so understandably he's going to be working lots of hours and sometimes he might simply be too tired to keep doing all the chasing.Don't play silly games like playing hard to get. He likes you. You like him. Simple. Maybe he is now waiting to see if you are actually interested, he has made all the effort so far so return the kindness and start showing him that you like him.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (5 December 2009):
Why don't you ask him if he has any free days and if he'd like to meet up? You'll know from his reaction there whether he's interested.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (5 December 2009):
 I wouldnt be "telling" him how to organise his life just yet,, you could ASK him if he knows of a day coming up when he would be free and you both could make plans.
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