A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Is my boyfriend gay/not interested/not very sexual at all? He and I have been together for about a month and a half, but we've only made out like 1 1/2 times. We made out once on Halloween, then about 3 weeks later we left school during break and we were kissing lightly but then he said we had to go now to get back to class on time. He's never had a girlfriend before, and his first kiss was with his friend who, at a dance, just said "Hey, I'll be your first kiss." just to help him out. I've asked about sex and blow jobs, but he doesn't care. Whenever I get close to him, he's not "hard", well at least I can't feel it, he might just be small, or shy. Anyways I'm much more experienced than him, but he won't take it any further, and when I ask him about his sexuality or his interest, he gets uncomfortable and offended. Please help, this hasn't happened in any of my relationships before. I need to know if this is common, or if he is scared, or if its me, or what! Thanks
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blow-job, kissing, never had a girlfriend, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, annakat +, writes (22 December 2010):
 Not all people are outgoing with things like sex and displaying their affection. I know these days it seems like people are in relationships and having sex earlier and earlier, but that doesn't mean everyone is. I remember when I was 16 I dated a guy who had never had a girlfriend before, and in the two months we were together I never got a single kiss. We held hands, we hugged, that's what he was comfortable with. I don't think that he's gay, but everyone has a different sex drive. My advice would be not to push him and to enjoy a slower moving relationship. If you really like him for just the sake of being with him you'll have fun with him. If you need more physical contact to be happy in a relationship then he's probably not the guy for you. But you never know, if give him some more time and get to know him a little better he might come out of his shell.
A
female
reader, HondaTohru  +, writes (22 December 2010):
 Um, you might be going a little too fast for him? As you said, it's his first relationship, so I don't think he's ready to get sexual with you after only a month and a half.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2010): He's probably NOT gay because he wouldn't date a girl and make himself miserable about his sexuality.My boyfriend and I have been with each other for a month and a half as well. Maybe he just doesn't want to rush you with anything. I know you may want to rush into things, but he might be the right guy to take his time with you. Don't jump to a conclusion that he's not interested. Its been a month and a half now.Maybe he's just not the type of guy to get sexual with a girl. Like I said, he might just want to take things slow and not rush. I guess he's just a good guy to wait like that. Another possibility is that he doesn't know how. Like you said, he's never had a boyfriend and you are way more experienced. Maybe he's just nervous because he has no idea what to do.You probably make the boy nervous. ?
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