A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my husband for 5 years, had 3 children the youngest of which is 2 weeks old. During our early days I found my husband had cheated on me so since then have never trusted him. I know it is wrong but I check his phone a lot and recently found that he spends a lot of his spare time looking at porn sights, and as I was heavily pregnant at the time, I got quite upset about it but not as upset as I am now, I checked his phone a few days ago and found that he looks at gay porn sights a lot, these have been visited again since I first saw them. I don't know what to think or where to turn, I can't talk to family or friends about it as they all think I have the perfect family and lovely new born son, he doesn't even know that I know. Please help me try to make sense of this, is he gay, is he bi or is he just curious ????
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (22 December 2010):
 I think it's more of just a fantasy thing for him because looking at the porn is far different from actually having a relationship with someone of the same sex.
Maybe you two should talk about this but you also need to find a way to bring back some trust in him because if he knows what you are doing it will make the situation alot worse. If you have no one to talk to then you could go try a counseler for this. They may be able to get you both to really open up to each other instead of everything being so secretive.
A
male
reader, Sex_counsellor +, writes (22 December 2010):
 Firstly looking through your husbands phone is not really a good move to make - as this opens you up to very difficult situations and may tell you things that you really do not want to know. It is not unusual for men to be curious and look up websites like this - often a sign of insecurity but is unusual in men who are married and have had children.I think as you have a 2week old son this is not something that would be best brought up at this point as you probably have enough on your plate.
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