A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I wanted to be honest and open with my boyfriend who I adore. It was about my past in bed, past boyfriends. I was only serious with one other. The question of size came up. It wasn't good, actually bad with my first serious boyfriend. Is great with current boyfriend, but his is smaller. I made mistake of being confused months ago and not honest about it. I think because if you looked at their things you couldn't tell. The only way I knew my first boyfriends was much bigger was cause how it felt during sex. Again, was bad, hurt, and he was horrible lover. But, my first boyfriend's went all the way down, 'bottomed out' as my current boyfriend named it. But my current boyfriends never has done that.It also came into conversation that my first boyfriends made more of a mess if you know what I mean.Is it really gonna be hard for boyfriend now?He wanted honesty over lies. Is it really that hard for a guy to know the other guy was much bigger? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): uhhh wow! I bet it was awkward admitting that to him. I still remember the feeling when my wife told me that.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010): I hear the last point. Yet, if you want a true, intimate relationship then honesty will be key. Way rougher though, same situation with my boyfriend. Super awkward bedroom talk and could tell he was way embarrassed.
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A
female
reader, bitch +, writes (1 January 2010):
I would always do whatever I can to make my boyfriend feel good about himself, whatever that is... So if you have to embelish the story, do just that. It is better to lie a little and make him feel wonderful than to be honest and make him feel less good about himself. That is my theory.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2009): I know how he feels. Hard to describe. I'm with that post earlier I'd rather hear the other guy was hotter looking or anything but that he had a larger dick.
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A
female
reader, x-kitycatlok-x  +, writes (31 December 2009):
 Have you let him know that your ex's size actually hurt you, caused you pain, and that his size is the perfect size for you? Just try and keep reassuring him that the larger the size, the more pain it's causing you. The only thing you can do is reassure him of your passion towards him and lack of it towards your ex. Good luck xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2009): wow - Not My Name - that must have been hard for your boyfriend. I got a reply like that. It's the hardest thing ever to hear. I'd rather hear he was better looking, richer, even maybe a better lover. We wanna know ours is bigger.
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A
female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 Why do guys set themselves up with such questions? You never hear of girls running around asking for comparisons on how tight the ex was ..lol . Well I have never known of anyone doing that anyway - please tell me girls don't actually do that ..lol
My current partner wanted to know how he stacked up against my ex. I tried to avoid answering at first, but upon being pushed I truthfully told him the ex was longer,... and before I could even add 'but yours is thicker', I got told I was an 'arsehole' lol. Hell, he asked!
I made him feel better a few ways tho, ...firstly by explaining my bits were only so long so anything beyond that is technically a waste, ...that it was nicer having closer body contact, ... that the contact actually helps stimulate the clitoris making orgasms easier to have, ... assured him using the analogy of a pencil (and how it would do nothing for anyone coz it is so thin) that girth was a more pleasing attribute than length, ... that there is not much sensitivity past the first 1/3 of a vagina anyway, ... but the one that really repaired the ego was simply telling him how much I loved his dick while we were going for it. And it's all true - even better!
So my advice, is give him reassurance, flatter the hell out of his manhood, then duck so you don't get in the way of his inflating head. :-)
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (30 December 2009):
 This is the male version of: Does my ass look big in these pants.
Only right answer is to leap out of the window.
Guys keep asking this despite women saying that size doesn't matter as much as technique and size actually hurting sometimes.
But to explain how hard this is for a guy. Suppose you learned another girl was tighter. Or her boobs were firmer, or more sensitive.
People have fragile ego's but on the hand if he can't get over it... then perhaps his ego is just to fragile.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): Same situation with me. I'm the second boyfriend who's wiener don't match up. was rough to hear. Same thing, my girlfriend knows cause I can't touch her bottom but he did all the time.
It's very embarrasing for me. I know she likes it with me and mine but mine can't do that to her. I also wish mine made a "mess" as you put it, like her ex did.
It is hard for guy. It's like he had her in a way that I can't have, forever.
But rather her tell me the truth, that's for sure. Just changes things a lot.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): I wonder why we ask these questions.
It's the same as when a woman asks "Does my bum look big in this" A clever man knows the correct answer!
Like cg says just keep telling him he is best and he should be fine. Also tell him that, it's you I am with doesn't that tell you who is better.
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A
male
reader, WiseGuy710 +, writes (30 December 2009):
I had a previous girlfriend in which it was a very similar circumstance. The way that you might have to approach it if you see him acting weird. Only do it if you see a change in his attitude. He might have just shrugged it off, and forgotten about it.
Otherwise, just let him know that you are with him now, and not with the other guy. Re-enforce the issue that you were not happy with how things were (sexually or otherwise) and you prefer to be with him in a aspects. Tell him how it hurt you, and that you prefer him over your ex.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 December 2009):
Hopefully not. Sometimes men can let this get to them. But so long as you keep reassuring him he is the best, hopefully he'll be all right with it.
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