A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:i'm "black" and i love white boys but they don't seem to like me all the time.i'm not a "gettho girl" at all.HONESTLY i act "white".Is it because i'm black?i don't really know can you help me?is it because i act white but not purposely.and i refuse to be a normal black girl because that's not who i am. i was raised in a all white daycare since i was 2.What can it be? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): Hello to you.I understand your worries.I am english and white,i am attracted to black men and they are attracted to me,but i did have worries about this at one stage. Just relax and you will give out the right vibes and a gorgeous man will come to you.The man you are attracted to.Good luck and happy hunting.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2009): I don't know you personally to judge whether or not your personality, looks or whatever else may be the problem. However, at your age boys are very afraid of breaking with the status quo. There may be a guy at your school who would love to date you, but may be afraid of what their friends would say about him dating a Black girl; so, he may shy away. In high school it takes a brave guy to break from the norm and date that girl who is not White or not skinny or not popular. When you leave high school, there will be more guys out there aren't so weak to peer pressure.That said, you said something that concerned me. Actually, as a Black woman, it kind of frustrates me that you say, "I'm not the normal Black girl." What does that mean? What is a "normal" Black girl? Why are you buying into the stereotypes perpetuated by reality TV and the media that "normal" Black girls are "ghetto"? When I think of a "normal" Black woman, I think of the women I know, who are like me. Educated, intelligent, strong, beautiful who hold themselves with class and self-respect. So, if you're saying you're not like the "normal" Black women I know, then that's a bad thing. To me the "ghetto" Black women are the exception, and contrary to what you see on TV (especially reality TV), they are actually the minority. Acting "ghetto" is NOT synonymous with "acting Black." Being "ghetto" is not about race, its about economics. There are more women like Michelle Obama walking around than there are girls like "New York" or those reality TV girls. Problem is, you don't see the Michelle Obamas or the Condoleeza Rices because they're not going on reality TV and making asses of themselves.I'm not trying to come down hard on you, but it is possible that this discrimmination against your own race does come through to White boys as being "fake". You don't have to act "ghetto" which you aren't to be yourself. Just be yourself.
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A
male
reader, Miguel Spain  +, writes (4 March 2009):
It could be that they don't like you because of your image or your personality and not because of the color of your skin. There are men who don't like black women though. But I personally love them, I mean, I don't like every black girl... but I cannot help check them out and I've been in love with or sexually involved with quite a few. I hope it helps.
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A
female
reader, molly4  +, writes (3 March 2009):
 well i sorta get how you feel, im a white girl and i like black guys. you just gotta be yourself, and when the right guy comes along, it probably wont matter what his colour is. but once you expand your horizons and meet lots of new people, im sure you will meet a lot of great guys who will want to date you. but dont date a guy just cause hes white, keep your standards! xoxo
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A
male
reader, dddddddd +, writes (3 March 2009):
Everyone looks for different things in a boyfriend or girlfriend. You just need to keep looking until you find a guy whose desires match your own.
Don't take it too personally. Just remember other people have what they find attractive just like you do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2009): You're black and like white guys, nothing wrong with that. There are white guys who like black girls.
But what's wrong with being black, you sound like you hate your own race. It's sad that you can get on the web and tear your own race down, maybe you should first become comfortable with you being black before you try dating and falling in love. YOU ARE BLACK but say you act white, therefore you not true to who you are. Maybe white guys are not asking you out coz they can see you're trying to be something else.
I also grew up in a white neighborhood, attended predominately white schools including college, but I'm still black. And there is nothing wrong with being black.
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A
male
reader, onefleshmin  +, writes (3 March 2009):
 My daughter is black and prefer white men over black. She has faced the same problem but not offend. You must realize even though you make speak proper english that are people who only see your skin tone. Also, certain geographic location is more tolerable for people of opposite races to date. I have explained to my daughter time and time be yourself. She has white friends who want invite her to their houses. She has cried and felt so insecure at times because black kids says she sound white and white kids will only accept her as a friend. She is currently dating someone white but his grandfather is prejudice. God did not make any mistake when he allowed you to be raised around majority of whites and that you are fearful and wonderfully made.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2009): I'm all for interracial relationships. I'm now white either, I'm latin and well we live in the 21st Century, I do not think you will have a hard time finding a white boy. Start by being friends with the guy you like, if they're intelligent they won't stereotype you. It is good that you forget stereotypes yourself too, you're giving the impression that all black people are ghetto and that blacks and whites act different.
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (3 March 2009):
I dont think that it is because your black. Maybe there is just something else that they dont like. Not everyone is attracted to everyone. I know that the person that you meet whether white black blue or yellow will like you for who you are. Just dont worry about the boys who aren't interested.
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A
male
reader, andrew loves hali +, writes (3 March 2009):
 it prbly is cause your black and im not saying being black is a bad thing im not races at all but i guess there is nothing you can really do cause you cant change your skin. so i guess its just their loss.
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