A
female
age
26-29,
*eanthia
writes: I used to have a best friend I told everything to, then one day she moved away. Lo and behold! A year later my best friend returns, everything should be perfect right? Wrong, unfortunately again, because when she came back she wasn't the friend I remembered. She bleached her hair, and got contacts and, this is really embarrassing, but my best friend has become a 13 year-old prostitute!!!! Help!!! She cusses me out and told me to get lost, practically laid on the lunch table in front of the guys, I've caught her making out with just about every guy in my school, she's not doing well in school anymore, she used to be the one who tutored me, she's just not herself anymore, and I'm freaking out, I used to look up to her like an older sister, now she openly admits she's a prostitute, the guys are all talking about her, and she tried to flash them in Gym class and this one creep's got his arm around her everywhere, she's smoking and drinking and on who knows what! Please I really need advice. I don't know what to say to her, or what to do, she won't talk to me, she's just not the friend I had. Is there anyway at all I can get my friend back? I swear I never saw this coming a year ago she was nothing like this! Help, I'm begging you.
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female
reader, Neanthia +, writes (13 March 2010):
Neanthia is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you to everyone who answered.
My friend and I don't talk anymore. She seems to have forgotten about me, but I'll be ok, I've got other friends. She's still acting like a slut, I tried talking to her but she just brushed it off. I really hoped when I heard she was coming back that it would be like old times, I guess it won't anymore. Things are looking up though, for me at least.
Thank you all again, for hearing me when my voice couldn't be heard by anyone else.
A
male
reader, curious4incest +, writes (9 March 2010):
IF she changes over the space of a year to someone completely differnt then she is not a real friend, to you or to any body. If she wants to me boys eye candy..let her be a slut and dont lose sleep over it because she'll grow up a whore and you'll grow up never remembering her. Only she can change herself.
Just find a friend and who knows maybe you'll me the one having long time friends not long time aids or herpies :P
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2010): if you see a drowning victum, you throw a life preserver dont you. Its then up to them to take it. If they dont what will you do next?
You value your friend alot and are obvously upset with how she is doing things now. Yes something has happened to her and she is just acting out.
But if you have already tried talking to her and reasoning with her, then sadly you have done all you can.
You could waiste more time trying to help her, but that will just drag you down too. Just tell her that you are there if she wants to talk and let her be.
If she wants to be saved she will come to you
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 March 2010):
There is no way you can get this friend back at this time. Something had happened to her while she's been away. It could be that she's been abused, raped, or she's just rebelled for another reason. I think your best bet is to tell an adult (teacher) that she's acting this way. And stay clear of her.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2010): Just be happy she's not trying to influence you to be just like her, pretending that it's cool. She might have problems or issues at home, or with herself, so try not to judge her. I would stay away from her though, as she would be a bad influence to hang around, and would make your reputation really rotten. If she doesn't want to be your friend, after trying to be hers, don't try anymore. Give her the old pimp hand she needs by ignoring her and letting her get what she's after. When she goes through enough trouble, she'll learn when to snap out of this phase she's in, and go back to reality and real friends. Do you really want to be good friends with someone who's labelling themselves as a slut or a trash bag? Only hang around good-natured people, and you'll have alot more fun. It looks like she's having lots of fun when she carries herself that way, but when she sees other people having cleaner fun and sincerely enjoying each others' company, she'll dream of having friends such as you, again. Be a good leader and teacher by showing a positive lifestyle free from trouble, and people like her will change for the better, later in life. Until then, look for friendships in people besides just her, and you'll be in a good place in life.
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A
female
reader, ashlydance33 +, writes (9 March 2010):
Being your age is never easy. And then throwing in friend you care about who is headed down a very destructive path only makes things harder. You can try to reach out to her and tell her you're concerns, but having been a 13 year old girl once myself I can tell you she will probably not listen. And if she is this far into her behavior, chances are it won't change. She's already been influenced too much.
My advice to you is to continue caring about her and to be there when she needs you but other than that, if you don't want to get caught up in this destructive behavior yourself, you should disassociate with this girl.
I wish you the best of luck!
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