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Being single and how not to be it...advice appreciated!

Tagged as: Dating, Health<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 May 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 13 May 2008)
A male Australia age 30-35, *CHP writes:

Well, to put it simply, I have been single but, oh around 6 months and now I'm kinda ready to start out again. But I have no idea what the heck to do.

Its not like I havent really avoided relationships, I just haven't really tried. The issue is A; I have serious emotional baggage from my last adventure, which I know is still there, bubbling away, B; I am so, so totally shy, it gets me all frustrated and burned up and C; the only way I find to cure that is to drink. And drink. And drink. Of which comes mood swings, outbursts and bad, bad depraved things. That and I have no idea how to meet people outside of my little social circle.

To the point, I need to somehow start again, go out, date, whatever. But I need to let go of all my issues all my substance abuse, yet need to rid myself of my stupid social retardation. Essentially, I'm stuck with the shy sober me, which I hate and the drunken emotional wreck which I also loathe.

Help I think is needed, desperately. I grow tired of my only companion being Miss Lefty (that's my hands name BTW).

View related questions: drunk, shy

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A male reader, TCHP Australia +, writes (13 May 2008):

TCHP is verified as being by the original poster of the question

TCHP agony auntGood point, but I'm not particulaly looking for a sexual thing. I tried that a while ago, and oh dear didnt it work. Actually I have engaged in a large variety of sexual encounters in my extended singledom. Sure it was fun, but now they just feel hollow and just depressing, especially when I engage with people in the same kinda emotional state as me.

Yes your right, I do think I should fix myself up, but I also think engaging in a new relationship related escapade will help that process emmencesly (spell check isnt on BTW), as I no have learned that sitting here, by myself, brooding doesnt do anything to help at all.

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A male reader, binhquangdao United States +, writes (12 May 2008):

binhquangdao agony auntHere's my honest advice. Number one you need to take care of yourself before you bring all this emotional baggaged into a relationship. And if you are desperated to find a girl to have sex with they sense that and if you are also desperated to go into a relationship they sense that also. Fix yourself before you want to get in a relationship or else it's gonna be unhealthy.

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