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age
41-50,
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writes: Hello,I am a 42 married woman who has started to embark on a sexual journey with my husband. We have an open marriage and tell each other everything. We recently agreed that we both wanted to fulfill our sexual bucket list. His is that he wants to be physically dominated by a professional dom and physically and emotionally be Sexually humiliated and teased. I have started mine by trying to become a responsible slut. I want to have several different men available to use me and have me do things that I won’t do with my husband. They should all be larger than my DH, be aggressive (without risk of too much aggression), and simply take what they want knowing I am there to service them. Just to give you an idea, I have one guy currently that is meeting this role. I stop by his house on the way to work, I give him oral sex that is very rough ( head holding, gagging etc) until he finishes and I am forced to swallow, which I don’t do for my husband. I’m trying to find single guys who are willing to get tested and be honest if they start dating anyone but have had little luck. Almost every guy I try to meet up with is intimated or only wants a one time thing (or lies about is size). I guess my question is are there any women out there that have done something similar? How did it go and where did you find the guys? If you were married what impact did it have on your marriage. I have a guy I’m meeting tonight but I think he’s intimidated by the fact I’m married. My boss whom I am close to has been making comments about needing a fwb to just use once a week but I think that could be playing with fire. Right now I am telling my husband everything and he’s very much enjoying that fact I’m with guys bigger than him. Thanks for reading
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2020): You don't have an open-marriage. There is no such-thing. That term was invented by a subculture that doesn't recognize the sanctity of marriage as it is intended. The term is used by those married-people who are legally/institutionally-recognized as married; but do things outside of tradition, and really don't take their wedding vows literally...or for that matter, neither do they take them seriously!
The real word for having sex outside your marriage is adultery (the legal/biblical-term), or having extramarital-affairs. Both are archaic-terms according to today's standards. Yet remain effective grounds to file for a divorce. It's nicer to call it an "open-marriage." You grant each-other permission. Lets just call a spade a spade! It's simply testing the limits of your partner's feelings; until what you're doing becomes so toxic the relationship erodes. You'll keep selecting and interacting with an assortment of sex-partners; like you would if you were single. Until you, or your partner, run into somebody you can't just pass-up, or let-go of. The heart, it's both deceitful and unpredictable! Logically, you may as well be single. It's Russian roulette, and eventually you shoot your marriage in the head. It's only a matter of time until your luck runs-out!
You are entitled to put your marriage to the test in any way you please. It's your relationship you've got to live with; and you'll also be the one to suffer the consequences. Maybe not, it might only be your husband. That's yet to be determined. If you were truly happy, and in-love; such endeavors would never cross your mind. Of course, you'd disagree with me; but that's predictable too!
In our "anything-goes"..."me-myself-and-I-society;" it's senseless to warn people of their "alternative" choices. You'll only be labeled as judgmental or prudish. I've also been here with DC a number of years, and we always get these types of posts. I've experienced much in my own lifetime; and I've yet to see an "open-relationship" that didn't fail! Oh, you'll get testimony to the contrary, for the sake of argument; but it's only a matter of time. People who gamble with their marriages and committed-relationships usually lose the crap game. It's best to let these people pursue their desires, and learn the consequences. There is no school like the "School of Hard-knocks." It's the devil's obstacle-course. It's full of booby-traps and land-mines! You're enticed into it with forbidden-fruit and lustful-desires. Human-weakness is his favorite food. Lust is found in all of us. That's what he aims for!
The devil's favorite hobby is destroying marriages and family-relationships. He gets his jollies tearing love apart, and grinding good things under his evil heels.
Enjoy yourself, the consequences come later; and they're always the same.
This is a site that offers people good and sound advice. You can take it, or leave-it! It's not always what people want to hear; but if you came here for opinions, I'm never one to bite my tongue. The outcome of your exploits is quite predictable; but you have to discover that for yourself.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2020): You are not so much married as training to be a prostitute.
I say 'training' because you claim you are not yet asking for money.
These salacious encounters are not remotely connected to 'having relationships' because the only interaction is short-lived sex acts.
You will not find encouragement or endorsement for this false representation of marriage.
I would imagine you are considering breaching the law on your exit by demanding cash.
You are not acting responsibily.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (15 July 2020):
 I agree with youcannotbeserious. I have been on this site for over 13 years and we just don't see too many posts like yours, it really isn't that kind of site. I honestly debated on whether to post it or not because I was afraid you wouldn't get the answers you are looking for. sorry. Surely there are other websites that would be more helpful to you? Good luck
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (15 July 2020):
 With the greatest respect, I think you are on the wrong site for this sort of advice. People on this site tend to believe in the sanctity of marriage and in fidelity. Why can't you and your husband play out your fantasies together?
There are plenty of sites which can offer you advice about this sort of behaviour. I doubt you will get much useful advice on this site.
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