A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am a 26-year old young professional and I have been dating a 30-year old man for almost two years.I recently mentioned that I wanted a pair of cowboy boots to wear over jeans just to go around the town with him because I liked the look. He proceeded to tell me that only wh*res wear them and that I needed to grow up.Out of line and controlling? Are there stereotypes about cowboy boots I am unaware of? I like the look, they're low heels and still seem fashionable.His excuse "women your age are making babies, you need to grow up and not pretend you are sixteen".Please advise. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, baddogbj  +, writes (5 October 2009):
 Yes it's out of line. Not a good sign.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): Please ask Mr. Ass to come to Texas and explain that... I have multiple female freinds that might take exception to his claim that they're whores. Better yet, their husbands might like to address that.
Dump this POS before he starts telling you what color shoes to wear. He's trouble with a capital T, and that stands for Texas.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): Oh, just realized you have been dating him for almost two years? You don't know yet if he is controlling????
I am confused, maybe he is ready to settle down and make babies and he thinks you are just playing....hmmmmmm???
Wear the leg warmers to bed and see what he has to say about that....:-)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): I haven't worn my cowboy boots for years, but I didn't know they were still worn over the jeans, with the jeans tucked in.....I think cowboy boots look best worn under the jeans as a boot, they are comfortable if well made so if you want a pair, go for it.
I would have been pretty offended by what else he added to his statement...was he drunk, in a bad mood, mad at you???? I can't say this little sentence indicates he is a control freak, but he certainly has some strong opinions on how to act and dress your age. Could he be right? Does he have a point, do you dress a little young for your age.....if not then he is just craaaazzzyyy and maybe not for you.
I am not going to tell you to ditch him, that wouldn't be fair because I don't know the whole story, the whole picture of him....but I would take notes on this and see how he does if you continue to date him.
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A
female
reader, Sweety Pie  +, writes (4 October 2009):
 I AM 16 and I dont see many girls wearing them tbh and I have no idea there was a sterotype about them! Personally I think they look nice with jeans! Maybe if you wore them with fishnets and a short skirt it would look whorish but go ahed and get some boots, and go see him wearing them with your jeans and let him see how good you look!
If he even notices!
Hes making a fuss about nothing, ignore him.
xx
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (4 October 2009):
 i agree! lose him.
also, cowboy boots (and any leather boots for that matter) are in for fall... you i say go for it!
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A
male
reader, pauly12345 +, writes (4 October 2009):
Well I think you should be free to wear whatever you like!
I don't think there are any sterotypes with cowboy boots. Perhaps he has had a bad experience with someone who wore them?
Also it might not be such a big issue to him and he could have been just joking. Might be good if you can to say to him "I want to get some cowboy boots and you said some really hurtful things, can you explain why that was?"
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (4 October 2009):
My advice would be to get rid of this guy. To say that they look like 'w***s, then to say you needed to grow up and to top it off says that women your age are making babies are signs of a very controlling man. He'll be choosing your shirts, trousers and friends next. All the signs are that this man is bad news. You are who you are, and he should respect you for that. If not, he's not the man for you.
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