A
female
age
26-29,
*lle1640
writes:Before i start rambling and telling the story behind my question..guess i should jump straight to it. Are men intimidated by smart women?So i'm 17, and not gettin into this whole subject, but i'm really close friends with a 35 year old that i've known for quite a few years as he's a family friend. I'm about to start applying for medicine at university, and naturally he's a close friend so i talk about it to him often and talk to him about exam pressure i'm going through and what i want to hopefully specialise in ect. Anyways, he works in sort of a dead end job, and he's a very controlling person..he likes to have the upperhand..my point is, when i mention something to do with medicine he goes extremely distant from me and it seems like he's intimidated by me?! Is it a turn off for men to see women smarter than them? or do they just not like te fact that some women are succeeding higher than they did?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2012): I think he is jealous of you. You are young, he is not. You are smart, he is threatened by that. You have potential while he is in a dead end job. Honey, any man who is like this to you, RUN. Do not associate with this person who will only bring you down. Distance yourself, and FAST.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (9 January 2012):
 He is an older, close family friend. Why would he feel intimidated or turned off by you getting an education, unless he planned to have sex with you or get into a relationship with you?
No, he probably is just getting bored with it, like CindyCare suggested. When guys end up in a conversation (or monologue) they really aren't interested in they have a tendency to zone out and not pay attention. Which works great as most of the time women just want to vent, we don't want a conversation about it, we just want to talk about it to get it out of our system.
ps. I think it is rude to refer to anyones job as "dead end". He probably has that job because thats what he wants. If he didn't want it he'd find something else. You'd be surprised with how many people there are who actually don't have ambition or want anything else.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 January 2012):
 It depends . Smart, self confident men are not intimidated by smart women, regardless of a possible difference in income or education.
Maybe you inadvertently bring up the subject too often.
I have a dentist friend who always wants to talk abouth teeth, and when she does, I fidget or change subject. I am not jealous of her career, just bored to death.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2012): I'll agree with what the others have said here, but to your original question, no not all guys. Take it from a first-year med student, people in general can find the very fact that you're doing medicine intimidating (get used to it, it carries on at uni :P) but I know that the fact that I'm bright and driven is part of what attracted my boyfriend to me in the first place, it's never bothered him that technically my academics are better than his, so as a general rule, don't worry about it, someone who's worth your time won't care :) x
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (8 January 2012):
 Yes, he doesn't like to feel inferior to a 17 year old. That is jsut THAT guy, not all men are like that.
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A
female
reader, Babs1 +, writes (8 January 2012):
He probably feels insecure or not content with what has happened in his own life. And he cannot relate to anything that your talking to him about. I would probably glaze over too. I think you should take a minute to realize not everything is centered around you. His reactions have little to do with your success, and more about his own life experiences. Maybe he can sense you think your better than him and this makes people uncomfortable. Even if he is intimidated, do you want to be intimidating to a close friend? I'm sure he's happy for you, maybe you should tone it down for him if you know it bothers him.
This isn't all men being intimidated, this is one person who is uninterested in your conversation. A male who is going through or has gone through what you have would probably have plenty to say to you. Find someone to vent to who isn't intimidated.
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