A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:[English as a second language speaker here]There's a girl in my class which I haven't found attractive before. In fact, I thought she's loud and annoying. Today she asked me a question about the assignment. Me being one of the smart kids in the class, I helped her (if it helps analyzing me: I'm academically outstanding and I have some ego). Now listen to this: I started to find her very attractive when she asked me for help. This happens to me a lot with different girls. But today I started realizing it. I get attracted to other types of girls, but I normally find it very sexy when the girl is helpless. Now I'm thinking, what kind of person am I? Is this tendency known for control freaks, or manipulative boyfriends to posses? I know the question might appear OCD or silly, but I'm a feminist and I try to behave and stay correct as much as I can.I find it sexy when the girl is helpless. Am I a douche? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2011): just because you like a certain type of girl, doesnt mean you will treat them a certain way. You treat that girl like you do any other girl. If thats being a douche then be a douche. If thats being a sweetheart, great. You make yourself who you are, and you have the right to like any type of girl you want.
A
female
reader, MissTellAll  +, writes (9 June 2011):
 So long as you don't take advantage of these girls finding it attractive that they're a little helpless is normal. You're a guy meaning you're genetically programmed to want to be strong and be a provider. Really, these feelings you're having are in your genetic make-up. Completely normal, so long as you don't let yourself become controlling or manipulative. There is a fine line between strong and abusive- don't cross it.
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A
male
reader, mrg123  +, writes (9 June 2011):
 Errr no you certainly dont sound like one to me. There are a class of people who do prey on vulnerability but I would tend to think they are unlikely to ask a question like this in the first place. All I get from what I see in this question is your a really decent, caring guy and thats why you are attracted to people in this way, you want to help. All I would say is be careful you dont have this genuine side to you exploited because there are certain people who are far from helpless but project that they are. Good luck, dont worry and take it easy :)
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A
female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (9 June 2011):
 it makes you feel more manly. as long as you have a caring and helpful attitude and you are not getting off on a power trip, i think its ok
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2011): Not at all. There is masculine and feminine energy and its important to have that balance. Guys love to be heroes and women love to feel their guy is their hero.
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