A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So me and my turkish boyfriend have been going out for just over 5 months now. I met him back in august when i was there on holiday and spent a month with him, I then went back in December to see him again for just over a week and I met his parents, and he also got me a promise ring. I'm back in England now and not due to go back untill august again, but i'm hoping to see him earlier.. I'm just wondering if anybody here has been in relationships with turkish people and know of anyway to get a visa for them to just come over for a short visa not to stay? I just want him to come over and meet the rest of my family and also see if there are any job opportunities for him here, as i would like him to stay here while i finish my college course. Then I would move back to live with him in turkey... Please help asap as i am looking for him to come over in april :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2013): Amazing i didnt want to write anything deragatory aginst one type of culture...but soooo funny it is continuously repeated here my first boyfriend was turkish here in my country and tore me to pieces i fell in love lost my virginity then he told me he used me after five years of promising to marry me and how much he loved me....i am biased...stay far far away i lost a decade of healthy relationships and married in a state of torn slf esteem which ended miserably...dont loose your prime years dont waste your time, listen to your parents you will be in love often, its wonderful its heartbreaking and its a gift...exoerience more in your life...sorry i know its hard to heat...goodluck xo
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (14 January 2013):
 Honey the best way to tell if he is serious about this with you is LET HIM DO THE WORK needed to be with you.
YOU doing the work makes it easy for him.... don't do the work.
don't even worry about it. LET HIM figure it out.
You will find that he's not all that interested if you don't do the work... that should tell you enough.
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A
male
reader, tby1 +, writes (13 January 2013):
 This is so common with Turks, how have you allowed him to manipulate you with his lies.
Scam scam scam all day long of everyday. End this farce ASAP or you will be hurt and made a fool of sooner than you know
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2013): You met him on holiday? How many girls meet him on holiday?It aint a relationship, you're not the only one in his life, he's obviously after the visa only.You're very young and naive, and will fall for his charms and probably wont learn until he's hurt you. Put it like this, if he doesn't get the visa from you....he will from someone else. A visa is like gold for the UK for anyone foreign, simply for our benefits and NHS. Hence a better life for anyone who doesnt have those facilities in their own country. Harsh reality, I probably sound slightly racist but its very true.Find someone closer to home who doesn't need to use you.If you go ahead with it, it'll probably have to be a quick marriage, then divorce when he finds someone better or his gf and kids from back home to flog into our country for the child benefit and income support! THINK about it!
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (13 January 2013):
 You must need your head examined. This Turkish guy is using you to get out of Turkey and into the UK. He cannot be sincere (as someone here even remotely suggests) after 1 month.
Are your parents aware of this problem? Why didn't/don't you ask them how he can get a visa?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2013): I am a Turkish girl. I am so sorry do not ever date a Turkish guy. He will most likely never respect you if you are not a virgin.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2013): Sorry, I can't help but be sceptical, as everyone I know who's had a romance with someone abroad has only been used for a visa. It's very uncommon for them to have good intentions. What does your family and friends think about this?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2013): Oh Dear. How old are you? You have actually known this guy, in person for a mere handful of weeks.... probably not even more than two months if you actually add all the days you have spent together. This is a holiday romance, nothing more. He sees you as a ticket to get into the UK. You are not the first and you will not be the last silly infatuated girl to fall under this type of spell. Grown women who know better also fall into this trap. He is NOT your boyfriend. You have NOT been going out. He is an internet pen pal.Please, for your own sake, grow up and see what this really is. You are still a child. In 10 years time, you will look back and wonder what the hell you were doing. If you carry on, you will be looking back with regrets and potentially a ruined life.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (13 January 2013):
 Your boyfriend will have to apply for a visa through the UK Border Agency. He has to be 18 or over. Here's a link to their website with some information:
http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/visiting/general/
He can visit for up to 6 months but isn't allowed to work, has to prove he has enough money to look after himself etc.
Not sure how easy it will for him to get permission stay longer and work in the UK. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (13 January 2013):
 http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/visas-immigration/visiting/general/extend/
He can also apply to college near where you live. If he wants to work there a degree will be valuable.
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