A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Am I wrong for wanting to get out of my relationship? .... We were together 3 years. He abused me emotionally and physically. Everytime i tried to leave he'd manipulate me into giving him anther chance. This time I didn't let him though he tried everything, even threatening to kill himself. For about a month he left me alone andIv been so happy- getting my life back, building my confidence back up.Then yesterday he started texting saying he loved me and needed me. I told him please just leave me alone. I'm happy now please just accept it. He's now turned nasty. Telling me I never loved him. That I must have used him for 3 years. He's 37 and I'm 23 and he seems to feel that he's wasted his time on me and I was planning all along to use him and leave him. It's really not the case. I left him because I'd had enough of the abuse. I'm starting to get scared and i don't know what to do :(. He was never religious, infact he hated religion but he's sent me texts saying he wishes I will never feel real love and he will "give me to his god" to get his right back. Also he said he's a good person and never wants anyone to get hurt but god will know who is right.Any advice? No one really knew about the abuse don't know who to talk to :(
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female
reader, Soconfused234  +, writes (10 July 2012):
 U left, and its over. DO NOT GO BACK! Delete his number and everything that leads back to him. That door is closed now and you need to continue to live your life! God will find you someone! Jus be patient. Pray for him as well. It seems he probably had some problems before you all got together. Pray Pray pray! God bless you!
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (10 July 2012):
stay well away from him, bullies like him dont want you to move on or be happy. you DESERVE better. good luck and keep moving on x
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (9 July 2012):
You made the right decision to leave this abusive, manipulative man. You should ignore all his efforts to contact you, and consider handing any threatening material over to the police if you fear for your safety. Talk to any friends or family members that you’d trust about the abuse you suffered if you can, and consider asking your doctor about counselling. You’ve experienced severe emotional abuse for years and it’ll take time for you to recover emotionally from this. Whatever you do, you must not allow him to manipulate you in to believing that you’ve done anything wrong: if in doubt, re-read this post and the answers we’ve given you.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2012): Leave this guy and don't look back! If there is abuse in the game, there can be no real love. Trust your gut feeling and instinct. You said how happy you have been feeling ever since you left him, that says it all actually. Don't give in to him! Good luck!
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (9 July 2012):
 Yes, I agree with the other advice that you need to block his texts, calls, emails if you can. Even if the communication gets through from him, you must stop communicating with him. Everytime you communicate back to him, he knows he still has you under his thumb. Do not communicate in any way. This is his way of still being able to control you.
If you have a trusted friend, I would suggest you tell this person what has been going on for your protection and piece of mind. If there are any threats to YOU, call the police. If he threatens to take his own life, pay him no attention. These are just attention getting tactics, once again, to control you.
Basically what everyone is telling you here is do whatever you need to do to protect yourself. I like what SVC said..."do not engage him in any way".
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 July 2012):
 Best piece of advice… block his number and his email… have NO contact with this manipulative man who is trying to make what you did (a healthy sane rational move to leave him btw) YOUR fault.
Do not reply to or engage him in any way. IF you are truly afraid of him being violent then you contact the police and document it… and if you must you get a restraining order that means he can’t come near you.
I doubt it will come to that… men like this are bullies and they will back down when someone wont’ take their crap.
IGNORE HIM and continue to get on with your life.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (9 July 2012):
 You made the right choice in leaving. What he says now is a result of his current desperation. He needs you back only so that he may abuse you again and again. That is how the cycle goes and how it will always go until he decides he wants to stop it. But I doubt it. Be wary of any threats however, take them to the police immediately.
Stay safe
I hope that helps.
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A
female
reader, Lara-PLM +, writes (9 July 2012):
You are not wrong to want out of this relationship. His behavior is manipulative and abusive, and you deserve better.
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