A
female
age
30-35,
*rishara
writes:Hi, im 19 and my boyfriend is 20. We have been together for 8months now. And we love each other since the day we met. Our feelings increase with each passing day. But recently we have been only seeing each other once a week because we both want our space. And I have been very frustrated with him or myself for no reason at all. I had been cold to him everytime we met and talk on the phone. I miss him alot but whenever he calls I acted like I dont miss him but treated him coldly. And I often cried after the conversation ends.I feel weak by missing him.Im angry cause I miss him?Is it because im too dependant on him?I have my own hobby, studies and own stuffs to do.I dont know why exactly am I feeling this way.What should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (21 February 2008):
 Then you need to change your attitude when you speak to him. When he calls you let him know it's great to hear from him. If you continue to act this way then you know yourself the calls will get less and less, after all who wants to have to "work" at talking with someone, your conversations should be happy, fun and upbuilding. If you can try to do this then he'll WANT to call you and be with you some more instead of the tension just building.
Don't add pressure to your relationship, it will only push him further away from you. Try it! Ask him how his day was, tell him you miss him and how great it is to hear his voice etc. You'll see the difference! ;o)
~Eve~
A
female
reader, trishara +, writes (21 February 2008):
trishara is verified as being by the original poster of the question We both agree to have some personal space and spend time together every weekends. We talk on the phone everyday.But I feel very weak letting him know that I miss him. Instead I just treated him coldly. I have been treating him coldly for a week now and I feel that Im destroying this relationship with my own hands. Im often in tears after we hang up the phone. I dont know why did I acted this way. He did ask me why am I not talking to him or show no interest in the conversation anymore. I just told him I dont know, without furthering my answer.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (21 February 2008):
 Hi Trishara, lovely name by the way. I think you guys need to sit down and have a heart to heart chat about where your relationship is going. Point out that although you both need your space, that you would like to compromise and spend more quality time together. You do not state whether you actually spent too much time in the past together or whether he told you that you are too dependant on him and who intiated wanting more space.
I think next time he phones you, that you should be more curteous and not rude to him otherwise you could stand losing him for good and that is not a smart move if you are trying to win his heart over. By all means, be a bit more casual so that you do not come across as desparate.
Carry on doing your everyday things, your life does not have to revolve around him 24/7. I know you miss him, but make every meeting you have with him just as fun and exciting like from the day you met him and not give him a hard time. Good Luck, Dusky xxx.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008): You sound just like my mixed up 16 year old son, he is growing up, frustrated, doesnt know what he wants from one day to the next. I think you are not ready to settle down with one bloke yet, but like him and dont want to hurt him, so you are torn between a rock and a hard place. I think you probably would do wise to remain on your own and away from each other for a time and get to know yourself and what you really want, before you do his head in as well.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (21 February 2008):
 Hi
Sounds like you have some barriers up and are a tad worried about wanting to see him more and letting him know that. Although space isnt a bad thing. Always good to have other interests apart from each other.
Sometimes we need to let those walls down a bit, say what you want, how you really feel about them, yes it leaves us vulnerable, but you cant be truly into someone without letting yourself be vulnerable. Thats love unfortunately.
Good luck.
C xxxxx
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (21 February 2008):
Hmmmmm something doesn't add up here. Who said "we both want our own space"? Did he initiate that conversation? Sounds to me as if you want to see him more and you resent the fact you only see each other once a week, hence the reason you're cold to him when he calls you. I need more info.
~Eve~
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008): you must talk to him communication is wht a relationship is all about
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