A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been a member of this site for a long time and have been reading a lot of the advice that is given. A lot of it varies and not everyone has them same answer which is to be expected. A few aunts or uncles I have been following give quite personal advice. This usually ends in them telling a self riteous story that is no help at all. I have also seen aunts or uncles at 16 years of age giving advice with marriage and affairs. My question is am I the only person who thinks that people should only give advice if the have experienced said problem or are wise enough to know how to handle the situation. I anticipate a number of 16-21 year olds telling me I am wrong but at that age I thought I knew everything. Am I the only person who beleives that the only person who can advise you on your situation is someone who has experienced somethins similiar and has some constructive advice instead of a young minds idealistic view of what they think should happed without ever experiencing it themselves.
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female
reader, person12345  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 It always seems to depend much more on how observant, just in general, the person giving advice is rather than how much he or she has been through.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011): I don't think it's all about previous experiences.. sometimes it's nice to hear others opinions about things that might be too embarrassing to ask friends in real life or something. Bouncing ideas at other people who are willing to talk about whatever on here.
It doesn't really matter on the age, it's just their opinion. And yes sometimes it may not be applicable, but we are all here to help each other right?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 If everybody should have gone through a certain situation before having a sense of what it is like and be qualified to express an opinion or a suggestion about it , then most of the world should be silent all the time. You don't need to be a pregnant teen mom to recommend using condoms. A doctor does not need to be an ex cancer patient to become a good oncologist. You don't need having been hit by a truck to make sure the light is green before you cross the street. And actors ( at least good actors ) must have a very precise feel of what is like to be a drug dealer or a cheater to effectively portray one- but they don't need to actually sell drugs or cuckold their
partners to get it.
It's not about the specific experience, it's about the gist, the core of it. People get to that core drawing from their own ( often totally different ) experiences.
If a poster writes about being sad and frustrated because of infertility problems, you don't need to be infertile to relate. You may be a mother of 7- who anyway has gone through the
pain of waiting and longing for something which never materializes , in some other area of her life.
In any case, what you can find on DC is not advice as in expert, professional advice. It's an opinion, a comment- often a new take , a different perspective on your problem. That may help too,whomever it comes from.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 At the end of the day, the more alternative points of view a person gets, the better. Yeah, 16 year old's and such may give advice about stuff they haven't experienced, but you can't say there is no value in a young persons opinion...
They CAN be idealistic and optimistic... they can also be insightful at times... Being 16 and having little to no experience on an issue doesn't automatically mean that they're wrong. Any poster with half a brain will see their advice, their gender, age, etc. and take that into account before taking it on board.
Don't think of what people write here as advice, think of it as opinion and right or wrong, who cares as long as the poster gets some feedback from an impartial 3rd party.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (9 April 2011):
 I don't think that those who give advice should be dismissed because they haven't gone through the same thing themselves. And truly, 16 year olds are qualified to give advice, some of it very unique in fact. Many of these young people had their homes ripped apart because their father or mother had cheated, or they have best friends who went through the same heartache. Oftentimes, it's exactly their voices that can pierce through to the heart of the matter....how the affair affect kids or teenagers.
Not only that, but so many question askers are around that age range, so the 16-18 year olds can give advice knowing the pressures of love and relationships in today's fastpaced, hookup, FWB, texting internet culture. They're wise beyond their years regarding sexting and those things that we lack the experience about.
It breaks my heart to know that today's 16 year old has had to grow up a lot faster in this world and culture than in ours and our parents' generation.
Not only that, but I've seen a lot of advice from young aunts and uncles hold a lot of punch on other things as well. Sometimes it takes a mind that hasn't been clouded by personal bias and baggage to present a viewpoint that is just as valuable in my opinion as the voice of someone who's been there. I've often thought of these boards as being special because of the different ages, backgrounds, cultures, and such.
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 Hm. I do see and understand your point. But I have my two cents on this.....ok, I have never had an affair and never been married. However, I have had a friend sob on my shoulder again and again about a married man and his promises-and from that, I will advise women not to get involved with taken men. I watched many marriages (within my family) fall apart and I witnessed fights, domestic abuse etc. I was able to then see what broke people apart-what kept them together. Now, I have had personal bad experiences too and reflect on them often. In this brave new world, you will find jaded teens who have been through storms you can't imagine. And is it so bad to base some advice on (albeit often naive) ideals? Physical age means little...As we witness pain, so can we feel empathy. As we experience pain, so we feel sympathy for others. Yes, youth can be arrogant I admit yet, some of us can contribute :) even when "wrong." To me, it means more that someone (anyone!) cared to answer.
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A
female
reader, matureflowerx +, writes (9 April 2011):
 I am actually 29 not 18-21 as it suggests
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